Forward looking

 One of the reasons our meeting go on and on is because we tend to focus on the past.  We keep repeating what happened, how it happened, why did it happen so, who was the cause (sometimes tracing it back to the series of causes, stopping just short of the Ultimate cause!), and so on.  While knowing the context in which things went on well or did not go on as expected and learning lessons is important for any evaluation, that shouldn't consume most of our time and energies.  We need to take stock of the facts and move on. We should focus on the future.  Planning our next move is more essential than prolonged dwelling on the bygone. Learning our lessons from the past and focusing greater attention on the future course of action, is integral to efficient planning. 

Unworthy renewals

 Rubbing salt on the wound, as if summer heat perspiration is not enough, is the laid back attitude of some who take life for granted.  Who have everything they need and still make no effort at contributing their little to the common pool of resources.  That was my thought as I sat at the back of the Church this morning, attending the Mass for the renewal of vows.  How I wished I could toss some of those sitting before me, not just out of the Chapel, but out into a furnace! At the same time, my mind was also telling me, that it is God who calls and perhaps he has a plan for these young Salesians - something of which I am not aware or, in my present state of mind, am unwilling to see! 

After three weeks of spaced out programmes and inputs, we found a couple of guys smoking in the rooms last night - just before the night of their renewal of vows! Last year, on this very day a few others were found with alcohol bottles in their rooms!  In the latter event, I wouldn't open my mouth to protest, because drinks are often served at table in practically all our houses.  So when the seniors drink, that too openly and sometimes, excessively, by what authority can I tell the younger generation that they ought not to.  But smoking??? When on earth do these guys pick that up?  

Sitting in the Chapel, it occurred to me, right now, we have within the Province, a long list of confreres, breaking every rule not just in the Constitutions but of the Gospel as well!  Confreres involved in financial mismanagement, unhealthy relationships, addictions, brazen disobedience, abuse of power, blinded by caste affiliations... and I don't mean, these are rare occurrences; these are habitual, brazen and seen as normal. 

Anyway, I have to remind myself, that it is ultimately God who is the master of vocations and it is His work that we are engaged in.  So if he feels a drunkard or a womaniser or a chain smoker is who he needs for his ministry, who am I to object?  Nonetheless, my conscience tells me that I cannot leave it all to God, for I am convinced he has put me here and now, with this role and that responsibility, for a particular purpose.  That does not let me see, without putting up a fight, my home, my family, my province go up in smoke! However I need to constantly remind myself that it is not God who needs protection or defense; it is the individual who needs accompaniment. 

The caste menace

 I never really fathomed the extent of caste rot in the Province, till I actually started fulfilling my responsibility as the Economer of the Province. Over the last couple of years, I've seen first-hand the prejudices, anger, bitterness, irrationality and absolutely nonsensical idiocity of confreres swayed merely by caste affiliations.  It has amazed me how strong and deep are these connections that cloud the mind and heart so badly that one grows blind (and deaf, and dead and what not) to the most evident facts of life. If only some of these confreres (not even all such 'infected') were half so passionate about Christ and his Gospel values, we would have worked innumerable wonders.  Anything and everything is viewed and interpreted based on the caste equation. Even common sense, leave alone, spirituality and ethical reasoning, goes for a toss.  It is sickening!  

Religious life, or priestly ministry, or for that matter Christianity itself, has no place for caste.  As Salesians we either leave out the dirty caste politics out of our apostolate, or show ourselves out of the congregation and the Church.  

Diplomacy in the apostolate?

 In today's reading we find Paul before the Sanhedrin, making a very shrewd move.  Indeed he shows glimpses of this 'Saul' personality.  Put on trial for preaching Christ, he cleverly incites one group (Pharisees) against the other (Sadducees), without letting them even get wind of his clever move. He merely puts out himself as one among the Pharisees, being accused of believing in the resurrection! The Pharisees fall for it and then the debate is all a fight between the two groups.  Paul, in the meantime, walks out with a sly smile (that's my addition!). 

And just when I thought that was it, there comes the message from Jesus: You bore witness to me in Jerusalem, now be my witness in Rome as well.  

One can be like the crowd, easily swayed by someone's clever distraction, missing out the core argument and point.  We end up, fighting and arguing, without even realising that we long stopped reasoning and focusing.  We can be like Paul, playing a diplomat or a politician, rather than being an apostle. Or could be that Paul was only being wise not wanting to waste his time 'preaching' to the group; hence he merely lets them get entangled with one another, while he gets back to investing his time and energy into positive outcomes and possibilities. 

Getting back to the scene played out at the Sanhedrin, the feedback of Jesus can be interpreted as an endorsement of the ploy that Paul played. Or it could be read as a chastisement.  I prefer to side with the latter.  For in Christianity, honesty is more valuable than diplomacy.  Paul was called to be an apostle, not a diplomat, and certainly not a politician!  

Perks or pricks of Freedom

 

From Telangana today... cartoon of the day 

Scarcity teaches us more

 One of the core lessons that I've come to learn, or rather, one of my beliefs that have been confirmed over the last couple of years is the fact that poverty teaches us more than abundance.  That in scarcity we find the true and deep meaning and value of anything, and life in general.  When we have something in abundance, we do not care for it.  We begin to realize the worth of it, only when that item or aspect diminishes or disappears.  

I've come to believe that most of us priests and religious have lost not just the value of money but of God himself.  We are exposed to both in abundance, hence the loss of esteem.  

Beyond amusing... birth certificate of cows

 Couldn't but ignore following headline and hence read the news article: 

Show birth certificates of cows...

Now in Bengal, under the new regime, some legislators are demanding birth certificates of cows to be issued, to prove their age!  While livelihood of Bangladeshis and voting rights of muslims are being snatched, the political system is keen to ensure calves are issued birth certificates. Rather than focus on educating and integrating knowledge with values, our political system is out to drag us back to the pre-human era. 

In another news photo that I by chance came across in the morning, some scientists dropped the carcass of a cow into the ocean. Of course, the photo was AI generated.  Luckily, this was in China, not in India, or else, it would have been the most debated and discussed news item of the decade!  

Responsibility of lack of leadership

 Faced one hard truth today... 

In the last couple of years, I had come to moan the lack of truth worthy personnel who could  be entrusted responsibilities with a certain level of confidence, that they would take forward the legacy of our predecessors, of Don Bosco himself. That list of capable and clear-souled individuals who have matured over the years of formation, who could be relied upon. That diminishing list.  That rare species.  

Today, someone questioned me if that is not a systemic fault - of the present leadership? In a way no; but also yes, in a way! No, because those shoulders who are mature enough to take on responsibilities were trained in the previous generation, era, regime.  So, not really our fault. Not mine. But, then I asked myself, if the situation is bad now, have I made it better for the next generation to have sufficient and reliable personnel?  Or done nothing much, and eventually this trend is only going to get worse?  

To BE rather than BECOME

Most of the disciples of Christ choose to be with Jesus, not become apostles or own possessions.  They chose Jesus, because they were enamoured by who he was, what he did and how he went about living his life. They chose to BE with him, rather than BECOME someone or something. 

Michael Rua and John Cagliero decided to stay with Don Bosco, not because they wanted to be his successors or bishops or leaders of the Salesian congregation.  They merely felt at home with Don Bosco and wanted to BE like him.  They had no personal agenda, rather they aligned their own aspirations with that of Don Bosco.  

Good to pay attention to this! These individuals who made an impact on the world, chose to BE with their models. Those who decided to stay with the models in order to become something, became politicians or businessmen, not leaders, not models themselves - at least not for the better! 

What am I full of?

 A lady good at teaching Maths is bound to be approached by the students for clarifications and assistance.  Certainly the number of students approaching her for tuition in Maths speaks of her capacity and talent. To such a lady no one is going to ask her to pack a kilo of pickle for travel abroad! (Unless she does that as well - in which case, sooner or later, the number of people approaching her for either tuitions or pickle will indicate what she is excelling at).  

Point of the story: what one is good at, or perceived to be good at, is that people approach one for.  

So the question: what am I good at as a religious, as a Salesian?  If young people don't find me good for anything, then why would they approach me?  Does anyone approach me asking for prayers, after all, I'm a man of the cloth and spirituality is supposed to be my specialty. So if no one asks me for prayers, they don't perceive me to be good at it. 

One thing I know that most people approach us Salesians, for: funds and financial aid!  That says something!  We have projected ourselves (can't squarely blame people for perceiving us all by themselves) as rich.  The distinction/clarification I wish to make is between people approaching us for funds for education or for education?  Do they see in me a teacher, an educator, or merely an ATM, albeit for education - for which they approach someone else. 

Substitution

 Today we commemorate the feast of a man who wasn't the firsthand choice of Jesus as one among the 12 apostles. 

Mathias was a substitute or replacement of Judas. He was filling in the shoes of someone who had betrayed the very Master. Not a pleasant or exciting offer. 

He knew well what apostolate meant. Nor was he a first timer or random passerby who got dragged into the inner circle of the early apostles. I'm sure he was around when Jesus went about his mission. So when the slot fell vacant, the choice of Mathias was not surprising to those around. 

Being a substitute he could have acted as a spare wheel, rather than take on the full responsibility. But I'm sure that wasn't the case. In fact I'm almost certain, he would have continued being who he was and doing exactly what he was doing earlier. Even if he were not to have been chosen, he would still been the same and done the same amount of good. I guess the same is true of Barsabas, the alternative option who was considered for the substitution.

That's virtue. That's integrity. Valuing who I am and doing what I truly believe is good no matter the circumstances around me or the existence or non-existence of power, position and responsibility.

Religious dichotomy

 In the movie The Shawshank Redemption, Andy in one of his conversations with Red, makes this powerful statement, which once in a while I recollect. 

The context which reminds me of this statement is the kind of life some of us religious live.  Most often, our parents and siblings live a much holier life than us who profess to God and His people to live a life of poverty, obedience and chastity.  It is not a comparison that I am most concerned with. Rather it is the life we choose to live vs the life we profess to live.  The widening gap is often so wide that everyone except the one living it sees the incongruency. 

And this decline does not happen all of a sudden.  The foundation for religious life is often laid in the novitiate.  However, some never bother to lay that foundation, even after ordination. These drifters, even if guided by human values - leave alone divine or spiritual values - will still do good. However, often the case is that such anchorless persons only make use of everything - even God - for their own private agenda.  

Dubious signage

My instant (and irrational) interpretation of the following signage above the lift, at Cochin airport... 

Go up a man and come down as a woman!

Tourism around the rice fields

Yesterday evening the family members of TD John took me out to show me a few places around Thrissur. Although I was not keen that they be my tour guides, given that in the morning there was a funeral in the house, they were keen to show me around, this being my maiden visit to Thrissur. 

We drove around the ship-model Church, Church of St Thomas, the cross and campus at St Aloysius College and a couple of their family homes. A trending tourist attraction they took us through was the rice fields, irrigated through Kole farming!! There is this vast zigzag area where there is the water canal and the rice fields on either side of it. Half the year these rice fields, I'm told, are lakes. In the summer when the water level goes down, the land is used to cultivate paddy. Makes sense! 

However, with the growing popularity of reels and youngsters posting videos on social media, this rather laborious work place is now a tourist destination! I wouldn't be surprised if a couple of the actual farmers have also set up stalls along the narrow banks because sale of snacks and tea at such places is more lucrative and income fetching than farming. 

As one of the family members stated, in another couple of months, these 'photographers' will find another place, making it viral and this place will be forgotten. 

Tourism around rice fields! Sounds weird, but if it raises some awareness and conscientization about traditional farming, nothing to complaint. Also if it is to understand the science and history behind the technique of utilising natural resources in a most creative and efficient manner, then it's really worth it. 

At the Syro-Malabar Mass

 This morning I attended a Syro-Malabar Mass. Yesterday was the funeral of the eldest brother of TD John and today they had the Mass.

This is perhaps the fourth or fifth Mass that I'm attending of this Oriental rite. Although fairly awake of the differences between the Oriental and Latin rite celebration of the Eucharist, what I noticed today is that the prayer of the faithful does not begin with the intention for the Pope, Bishop and clergy. Rather it is one of the last intention. In a rite that's highly hierarchical, it is surprising to see this order of intentions. But I'm certainly not complaining!!!

Then there are the altar servers. I think that role is only for the boys - and I wish I am wrong. But, oh boy, unlike the Catholic Mass, the altar servers have to be attentive all through. They serve in a much more involved manner than the Latin rite Mass. In fact, they have more practical roles and responsibilities during Mass than a Catholic deacon at the altar.

The Church (old and new) at the monastery at Elthuruth, Thrissur

A life of witness

 An excerpt from a reflection I received today...

Indeed, 'some of the loudest sermons are whispered by the lives of the quietly courageous.' 

That’s the kind of faith we are called to have: 

Not a faith that looks fashionable; 

but that’s faithful. 

Not a faith that always roars; 

but that refuses to retreat. 

Not a faith that is just worn on the neck; 

but that's clutched in the heart.

Basically, a life of witness, lived joyfully and generously, because one is rooted in God and his values/Gospel. 

Fiasco in the making

 Most of the time we fail to plan. We are severely allergic to planning.  Even if and when we do, we do it so shoddily that we achieve nothing. By luck, (and by the hard work of some passionate lunatic) even if we do achieve something, for lack of a long-term vision, the little results fizzle out and we return to ground zero, sooner than later.  

The worse part of such an unplanned enterprise is that the whole endeavour not only does not cause any positive ripples (leave alone, impact) it also destroys all that has been built up or invested in, over the years. 

And the comedy of the whole process is that we, priests and religious, come out of it unscathed!! This whole failure does not pinch us a bit!! 

One of the root causes of it all is our allergy to planning.  Even when we attempt to do so, it barely has teeth. Most often it is wishful thinking, not a concrete SMART plan. And once prepared, the only thing the earns is dust.  That plan is never looked at, leave alone implemented or evaluated.  

Unwanted pregnancy?

 I've come across the phrase 'unwanted pregnancies' many a time and perhaps it is standard term in vocabulary and linguistics. Nonetheless I prefer we rather use the phrase 'unprepared pregnancy' to refer to the same meaning. Or even 'unintended pregnancy'.

One can't 'want' to have sex and be 'unwant' about one of the natural outcomes of the same. Most importantly, I prefer the proposed change of vocabulary since the former phrase appears derogatory in its reference to a child, who has had no say whatsoever in its own existence. 

Misplaced glorification

In the Acts of the apostles we read Paul and Barnabas carrying out their ministry in Lystra. While there they engage in preaching the Gospel, and working miracles by healing the crippled.  Witnessing the miracles performed by them the citizens of Lyconia glorify them and name them as Zeus and Hermes (Greek gods). 

This glorification of humans by other humans is not something uncommon. Often some of us  religious and priests too find ourselves on such an exalted pedestal. A cursory reading of the text or any such situation can be interpreted as the esteem and respect attributed by the beneficiaries to those offering the help. 

Nonetheless they are could also be somewhere within our own efforts at proclaiming the Gospel, a subtle aspiration to be glorified ourselves, rather than letting Christ take centre stage. A worse scenario is where Christ never was and is the focus. He is only an excuse. In His name, we blow our own trumpet. 

It need not always be the admiration or misinterpretation of the listeners. Perhaps, in exalting the preacher, the listeners have rightly understood who the 'hero' is. Hence the glorification of the preacher. 

I know not if Paul and Barnabas sensed this 'failure' of theirs to reflect Christ, and in despair tore their garments, but even if not, at least they had the courage to correct the people's misplaced trust. Either way, it is a good lesson for us priests and religious to get our act and priorities right. 

Insanity

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results!

 This quote is often attributed to Albert Einstein.  Whoever may be the actual one who first decided to define insanity in such terms, is to be appreciated. 

Translating the word 'insanity' into the local telugu language sounds more powerful and apt! And there are quite a few Salesians who excel in this art of insanity.  But what qualifies some of us, more as perfectly insane is the stubbornness with which we justify doing the same.  Not even are we open to considering alternatives or possibilities or even an evaluation of the same. 

If Einstein were to have known some of these typical Salesians he would certainly have added another like to the same definition of insanity: Doling out money over and over again, without as much as a plan or effort, and expecting miracles to happen... that's a higher stage of insanity! 

St Joseph, the worker

And though they son were God indeed 

over that home no Angels sang 

but still through years of toil and need 

hammer and mallet bravely rang 

and surely t'was a gracious thing 

when standing at his father's knee 

the world's great craftsman and its king 

not king but craftsman learned to be. 

The Lord himself learned to be a carpenter under your care,help us too to appreciate the beauty of hard work and to recognise the dignity of every labourer.

Telling the laity what a priest should do!

 The paradox of this evening's Mass on the occasion of Maundy Thursday was the sermon!  The Priest spent 90% of the time speaking about how a priest should be! What should be a priest's attitude? How should a priest carry out his pastoral ministry? What a priest should do and not do? ... on and on he went! 

And whom was he preaching to? Over 2000 lay people, mostly families with small children.  If at all he were to have preached his one hour sermon turning around facing the four priests who were on the altar, it would have made some sense.  No!! He gave us, non-priests, a full dose on how a priest should be!  

That's called brains! It is akin to berating those present in the Church about those absent! And still we religious want people to attend Church services and pay attention! 

Job satisfaction and fulfilment

 Yesterday I had an interesting conversation with one of our former staff.  Although he had resigned, he was still on board for selected but scattered tasks that we asked him to come on board.  So far so good. 

The discussion began about our present work condition and I thought he was keen to know how things work within the organisation.  However, sooner than later he stopped me and said, I came to basically share with you my difficulties!  I didn't see that coming.  Nonetheless I listened to him and very soon realised he was looking for some challenging role and responsibility.  He wasn't asking. He wasn't demanding. He was placing himself before me and asking me to challenge him with a task.  He wanted that thrill of being felt useful and capable.  He wished to pour out his energies into something that others had failed at or feared handling or proved incapable of completing.  

Later in the night I discussed what I had in mind for this particular individual with the others in my organisation core team.  They were more than excited about how perfect a fit it was: the man, given his capacity and experience, and the task/role I proposed. 

I guess it is not always about money or fame.  At times and more than we like to think of it, a job is not merely a monetary source - it is a vital source of meaning and fulfilment in one's life.  And I hope and pray that more and more of us priests and religious see our life and service as meaningful and fulfilling rather than anything else. 

Vocation and service

 A poster created by the INB vocation promotion team. Quite apt on the occasion of Maundy Thursday.

Mandate to ...?

Feast of the foot-washing!  I'm sure Fr Maliekal would be first in line to rename the day for this title!  And he has his very valid and contextual reasons for doing so.  

The Maundy Thursday mandate can be interpreted in multiple ways.  Service, being one of the them. But it is not service merely because the other is in need that I reach out, rather I reach out because I love the other.  In the case of the former, the situation of the other prompts me to action, not my own conviction. The context of the other changes for good and in all probability the person falls off my radar.  Whereas in the latter, I love the other no matter what his or her condition is.  

Moreover, when service is an outcome of love, I do not have to have great wealth or assets to do service ("Give us a project or funds and only then we can do something!").  Love propels me to be creative in reaching out.  

Interchange Jesus and Daniel

 A couple of weeks ago there was this reading where we hear of the trial of Susanna and the smart judicial move of Daniel, the young prophet.  The same day Gospel narrated of the incident where Jesus defends the woman caught in adultery.  

Attributed to François-Guillaume Méneageot circa 1779

All through the Mass that day and for a couple of days I couldn't get a particular weird imagery that flashed across my mind: what if the two, Jesus and Daniel, were to be interchanged! Would the incidents unfold the same way as we read them in the Bible?  In other words, would Jesus have forgiven the two corrupt officials, rather than them being sentenced to death.  Would Daniel have scripted the woman to now throw stones at the men gathered to put her to death, or atleast the one(s) who forced her into prostitution or adultery?  

Perhaps this has been plaguing my mind, since I too am faced with a similar situation wherein I need to take a stand.  However, I have in a way made up my mind... after much tussle and inner turmoil.  

More than the final outcome of the incidents with the interchanged characters, I seek to understand the process or the rationale or the principles that would guide each of them to come to whatever conclusions they would arrive at. 

Betrayal

 The most intense battles are those with the closest. In Jesus' case too it was the same.  The very people whom he chose to assist, are the ones who rebelled the worst.  Even among the ones he himself choose to be his inner circle, deserted him when the time was the most challenging. 

Betrayal therefore takes different forms: the emotional betrayal of Peter when he denies him; the selfish monetary betrayal of Judas who 'sells' Jesus for thirty pieces of silver; the silent betrayal of the other apostles who stood by dumb or 'disappeared' without the slightest of protest; the mass betrayal of the population who followed Jesus and witnessed his personality and intent at close quarters for a considerable time... 

History often repeats itself. Good to observe what Jesus did! 

Alarm blues

 Years ago while as students at The Retreat, Yercaud, I had a senior who was weird in every sense of the word and deed. He once borrowed (by force) from another companion an alarm piece. This alarm was a bit of a fancy one with multiple options and what not. 

This senior set the alarm much earlier than the usual rising time and woke up when it rang in the morning. So far so good. But he hadn't bothered to learn how to switch it off! And being in the dormitory of 30 people, most of us cousins of Kumbhakarna who love our sleep, this continuous alarm was a disturbance. This senior first tried to silence the alarm by putting it under the pillow. No chance of the sound not still being a nuisance. Then he put it inside the individual wooden locker. Still no much of a difference. After a few minutes of fellows yelling and shouting to put off the alarm, silence prevailed. 

After breakfast, during morning jobs, the owner of the alarm approached this senior and scolded him because everyone was cursing him thinking it was him who caused nuisance early morning - after all all of us knew him to be the owner of that alarm. The senior too was fed up with a few of his immediate neighbours who gave him a piece of their mind for the confusion in the dormitory. He told this owner, "Go, collect it!" "Collect it? From where?", asked the owner. "From the terrace!" came the reply!!

Dreams and discernment

 Listening to the brief homily of the Mass of St Joseph, it struck me that Joseph received all his communication or 'instructuons' via dreams! He dreamt an angel telling him to take Mary as his wife. He was told in a dream to flee Jerusalem. He was informed in a dream to return from Egypt. He truly was a man of dreams!! And faith, to believe that what he saw in a dream was what was actually expected of him.

Then it also struck me, Don Bosco was a man of dreams! The number of dreams that full his biographies! So did Martin Luther King dream! And Abdul Kalam speak of his numerous dreams. 

All these great visionaries and leaders were guide by dreams. If course, not all of them would have been something they went through, at night lying flat in their bed. Yet these are the facts that drove them. That propelled their actions and their whole life.

Hence the confirmation of my prayer which Ive been praying more and more: 

Lord grant me the wisdom to discern Your will and the courage to live it, no matter the cost.

The axe was long falling

 Today was another serious confrontation, butthis one was very peaceful and calm. Most probably because even before the individual entered my office he knew he had no line of defence. Yet, that did not deter him from putting forth some lousy illogical arguments, which was evidently not clear to himself in the first place. 

Within a few minutes into our dialogue, his initial little hope began to evaporate. I could see it on his face. I could read it in his eyes. He didn't put up any fight, but merely surrendered to what he already guessed would be the final outcome. 

At a point I felt sad for him, for he is much senior to me. I could see that he felt cornered and helpless, not because of me or my questions, but because of what has lead to this day, this heartbreaking dialogue - his own doings. 

Looking back at the whole discussion, given the context and content, I feel pleased with how I put forth my points - firmly and clearly, without in any way humiliating or disrespecting the person. Even though none of his responses were anywhere near truthful or convincing, I did not loose my cool, not even a frown. Perhaps also because he never 'fought'. He knew the axe was long falling.

St Joseph

Joseph, the Church of God protect;

Her priests with holy care endow; 

Shield of the virgin-souls elect

Hope of the fatherless be thou:

And when our parting spirits cling

To earthly joys that cannot bide,

Make Nazareth in our homes, and bring

Jesus and Mary to our side.

Guilt, courage and change

 When confronted by someone, abruptly out of the blues, with some serious lacuna or fault of ours, the most common and immediate reaction (besides shock) is denial.  One is too lost to see oneself 'naked', exposed.  Naturally the mind goes into overdrive to cover oneself up - with whatever one can think of!  In this process, one blurts out things which often end up doing more damage than good.  

While this immediate response or reaction is understandable, continuing to be in that same state of denial and attempting to cover things up, is a sign of a weakened conscience. Such a person will always find it hard to make any changes in one's own life, because he or she has not really accepted the truth about oneself.  Without primarily accepting one's own given situation, and acknowledging (at least to oneself) that it is not the best of oneself, how does one move to a better state of life or living?  

While guilt is a terrible burden, it can also move us to be courageous.  Courageous enough to accept the fault and seek ways to make up for it, all the while keen on making oneself a better person.  I also understand that it is easy for me to write this, as one not affected.  Nonetheless, I tell myself, if I do not have the honesty to admit my own mistakes, small ones to begin with, and in all sincerity, I will never have the courage needed to admit mistakes that I constantly bury without a funeral! 

Comfort in misery

 The incident we hear in the gospel today can also be interpreted differently, indicating to us that the Lord expects us to take responsibility for ourselves.  Not merely wait for help to arrive and do all the work.  We are expected to do the heavy lifting ourselves, for ourselves! 

The man at the pool of Bethesda, is shown as waiting for healing. Unfortunately there is always - always?- someone who enters into the stirred miraculous waters before he could.  Now this could be the case of a couple of days or months.  But it cannot be so for ages!  Unless, the man himself is not keen to get healed!  He is comfortable in his misery. Perhaps, he is used to earning a living 'showcasing' his physical condition of paralysis. 

To such a man shirking his responsibility, Jesus says: 'Pick up your bed!'  

While God's grace and peoples generosity requires no additional support or reason, one cannot escape one's own responsibility towards oneself. Healing, change, growth are matters - among many others - which require one's own consent and will.  

Some English tips!

 This morning one confrere during the meeting concluded his observation thus: 

One cannot expect everyone to know everything on one's FINGER SPOTS!

This confrere often comes up with such words or phrases, with such confidence, in public, that those who know a little good use of English sometimes begin to doubt their own knowledge!

Balanced apostolate

 Among the Priests and religious there is an allergy towards the paper and desk.  So anything to do with studies, documentation, forms, surveys, reflection is always the last thing to be attempted - if at all one does.  The contemporary religious are light years away from the priests and monks of the medieval ages who excelled in diverse fields. 

Today our morning discussion as part of the Mission Poverty Eradication review, I realised another dimension of the same 'desk-fatigue'.  But this dimension has more to do with a lack of organisation and repetition that leads one to slump everytime one hears or is told to fill out a form.  

There is a tussle between engaging oneself in/with charismatic services or apostolate on the one hand, and keeping tab on the impact or effect, on the other.  Called to be apostles, the Gospel does not tell us to keep track of all the good one does: let not your left hand know what your right hand is doing. One is called to love and do good. End of story.  But unless one does an assessment or review of what one has done and if that has actually done some benefit, one does not know if he or she has to continue the service, the style and the procedure or rework it all.  Furthermore there is the fear of the inability to answer the question: 'What are you doing?' or 'What did you do?'

While the value of accountability can never be undermined, on the one hand is the accountability to God and to one's own conscience. For this no log book or account abstract need to be prepared.  On the other hand, one is also called to be accountable to our benefactors, the government, the religious community, the society at large. 

One has to have a BALANCED approach.  If lobsided, one might as well live in a cloistered monastery (but even there one will have to be accountable in the latter sense!) or in a cave, all by oneself. And if leaning on the other side, one might not be charismatic.  

Alone [Alan Walker and Ava Max]

 

We all need that someone who gets you like no one else 

 Right when you need it the most 

 We all need a soul to rely on, a shoulder to cry on 

 A friend through the highs and the lows

God and humanity

 

The amazing ability

Sherlock Holmes and his smart assistant Dr. Watson go on a camping trip, enjoy a heavy barbeque dinner with a bottle of whisky, set up their tent, and fall asleep. 

Some hours later, Holmes wakes his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.” Watson replies, “I see millions of stars.” “What does that tell you?” Watson ponders for a minute. “Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Timewise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?” 

Holmes is silent for a moment, then speaks. “Watson, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent!” 

Watson had missed the most obvious observation. He was clever enough to notice the complexities of the stars, but he missed what was plain and simple. 

I remember this particular phrase in the book Jesus plan for a new world, which the author uses to describe the apostles, as to how they had "the amazing ability to miss the point." Even the most best of us sometimes miss the obvious.

Doggy conversation

 Sometime in the morning, while scrolling through a news article, I came across this particular teaching asking her students to come up with a creative writing essay about the conversation between two dogs.  I thought it was a brilliant idea evoking and tickling creative energies of children.  I'd love to see what my nephew and niece would come up with, if I were to assign them this task!  

And just as I was calling it a day - or night? - I came across this cartoon! 

A good way to end a rather satisfying day! 

Busy, but satisfying day

 After long - really a very long time - feel a sense of excitement about the various tasks being carried out. I think, today I practically touched every field of work that I have ever involved myself in (except Philosophy!!!).  

Almost completed a script for a 60 sec video on the theme of solar energy production, keeping in mind for a school ... in line with my own responsibility of administration. But with my media experience!  Feel good about it. Of course, the video itself is not started. But the concept, and it taking the shape of a script is greatly fulfilling. 

Then there was the issue of property tax and its nuanced loopholes and solutions as well. Great lengths of discussion and learning about it today. 

Land matters is something that is becoming something of a common topic everyday! More problems and in a way, more possibilities as well.  Talking about it with people of interest, gave me a possibility which never occurred to me before. That was exciting! 

Then there was a large chunk of the day spent on moving forward a project on digital documentation. As I confessed in my mail to all those involved, having people so excited about it and breathing down on our necks (in a very very positive manner) propels the rest of us to action.  Besides the adventure of the work itself, there is also the thrill of working with like-minded passionate people.  Oh, it is a great adrenalin boost! 

Being the economer, not a day goes by without doing some math!  So it was!  

Chalk to tapes and poles

 Today I have been discussing with various people, about various issues, legal and land matters.  It has been very diverse and complicated.  During one such conversation after supper at table, here in Vijayawada, I remembered an incident nearly four years ago. 

I had just taken charge as the Economer and one day along with Thathi and KP Mathew found myself in Mallepalli, Nalgonda. We were doing a land survey of a plot of land promised to us Salesians.  As I was assisting the surveyor, with his tape and digital pole, at one point I noticed Thathi smiling.  When asked what he was amused at, he replied, "Instead of some chalk you are now holding tapes and poles!" 

Well, at times I chuckle to myself.  From what to where have I come, in these part four years!  From being a teacher of philosophy to a financial administrator! That too with no background whatsoever about matters related to law, land, administration and finance!  That said, do I have any regrets? None at all.  Because I know what I am here for is not to do what I want to, but what God and the Congregation wants me to.  Mine is not to ask what and where, but to do with my whole heart whatever it is that is asked for the good of all, especially the young. 

Influenced and altered

 A group of two brothers were roaming in the forest, when they found a couple of tiny birds of the family of linnets. When the boys got the birds home, they put the linnets in a cage, opposite the canary bird, which was held in another cage. (Canary birds are known to be “Singing Birds”) 

 They explained to their mother that they hoped the linnets - being so young - would learn to imitate the singing canary. Instead of cheeping as normally birds do, they expected them to sing (like the canary). 

 The next day the boys entered the room, and exclaimed: "Mother, come here, look what has happened! Our canary is cheeping like a linnet!" The mother came in and found it so! 

Instead of the linnets learning to sing, the canary bird forgot its ability to sing! Thus, the canary had to be separated from the wild birds of the wood and kept under cover for a time before regaining the singing ability. 

Such is the case with Christians or anyone who allow themselves to be “influenced and altered” by the ways of the world! We may end up losing the “Song of our Faith!”

[Reflection by Fr Jijo Jose Manjackal MSFS]

Rethinking apostolate

 We Salesians have earned for ourselves a reputation for 'going big'. Our interventions on behalf of the young are often mega events and involving large numbers.

Our buildings and homes are huge. So much so, that if we have a small residence or building we feel claustrophobic - the young therein are absolutely not bothered by the size of the building though! 

Perhaps this has been one of our characteristic style of operating. But we need to realise that we have huge multiple buildings but no children therein! If we do, they are so few that even if we allot a room for each, we will still have rooms to spare! We may still be blessed with 6-7 digit figure project funding, but those projects define our apostolate; not the need of the place or the poor that define our mission. 

Sooner than later we will need to radically rewire ourselves, our attitude and our approach to see apostolate as disjoint from buildings, projects, and a 'me-first' outlook. Move from 'going big' to 'going deep'.

Don Bosco's boys spilled all over the place and then he built bigger places; he didn't build mega houses and then look for boys to fill the house!

Parking confreres

 I had a good laugh when I came across a statement in a letter written jointly by the Formation councillor and Economer General.  The statement reads 'Rome is not the place to 'park' out of the province for a few year difficult confreres'. 

What an expression!! Park confreres! Very very apt and direct.  Couldn't agree better! 

I remember almost two decades ago when I was in a student community comprising of priests and religious from various congregations, there were a couple of priests who certainly were there purely because their congregations had 'parked' them there!!  No other reason!  Not for studies. Not for their growth.  Not for the mission.  But purely for those back in their own Province or Diocese, to breathe easy for a couple of years... at the cost of that student community!  The only good thing the rest of the community felt because of their presence in our religious house was that the lives of two families (if these two gentlemen were to have got married and had families of their own) were saved! 

I guess that's one of the serious drawbacks of priestly and religious life: when someone is absolutely an unfit - even by his or her own judgement - in the community, province/diocese, anywhere and everywhere, no one can do anything other than bear and bear (the patience to grin is long evaporated!). Neither will the person himself/herself have the moral conscience to walk out; nor can others throw him/her out.  

Pride

A former and famous world heavyweight boxing champ, considered among one of the greatest sportsman of all time was also infamous for bragging, often saying, "I am the greatest!" 

 Once before the take off on an airplane the stewardess reminded this boxer to fasten his seatbelt. "Superman don't need no seatbelt," he told her with pride. 

The stewardess was unwilling to compromise. So she retarded, "Superman don't need no airplane either." 

 The boxer was naturally discomfited in his pride. In shame, he fastened his seatbelt without saying an extra word. 

 Pride can block a person from being open to the views, trends and wavelengths of other people and situations. Even shutting out God from our plans, proposals and journey - under the impression that 'I can do it all'.

Education or Customer service

 Teaching profession is considered and IS more a vocation than a career.  There are very many teachers who treat their work more as a service than a timed-duty which they fulfill merely for the remuneration. These are the teachers who go over and beyond the mere classrooms and exams and marks.  They see students more as children... at times, like their own!  

However, with the shift in market trends and culture in the society at large, education is more seen as a ladder to prosperity than a moulding of character. In such a context, it is often the teacher who ends up at the receiving end.  Parents demand that teachers 'teach' their children, convinced that having paid the fees, it is now the responsibility of  the school and teachers to 'educate' their children.  Their role as primary educators is easily forgotten and passed on to the teachers.  

I came across an article which aptly described today's education scenario as a 'customer service' enterprise, where parents and students are out to demand from the teacher.  The wrong notion that the parent or the child is a customer is at the root of it all.  The worst is to misunderstand education as a commodity; rather than a value based skill to improve one's character, personality and convictions.  

The teacher, like stated by Socrates and Aristotle, is only a facilitator who assists the student to become wise (not merely a basket of knowledge or information).  The teacher does not 'pour' or 'fill' the student with knowledge - that would be an insult to the child/student itself! 

The power of personal experience

We believe not because you said so, but because we have seen and met Him ourselves.

This is the line that the Samaritans state to the woman whom Jesus interacts with at the well (today's Gospel passage).  There is a whole lot of boundaries or social taboos that Jesus breaks or goes beyond - just in today's gospel passage.  He is interacting with a non-Jew.  That too a Samaritan.  All the more a woman.  That too a woman, of not so good repute.  

And Jesus feels filled.  "I have food that you do not know of!" 

Jesus sees beyond each of these social barriers and obstacles and reaches out to a human being.  

And that decision of Jesus, followed by his action of seeing through his mission, wins him a whole village!  

The villagers now believe in Jesus not because he performed a miracle or a great favour.  He merely interacted with them as a human being, a fellow creature.  

This particular image is the only one I came across where the woman is seated and Jesus is the one standing.  

Halo

 

Everywhere I'm looking now I'm surrounded by your embrace Baby, I can see your halo You know you're my saving grace You're everything I need and more It's written all over your face Baby, I can feel your halo Pray it won't fade away

Indian traffic

Traffic in the major cities of India can be at times horrific.  Although Hyderabad is far better than other metropolitan cities of the country, there are days and times, when things come to a standstill, for long.  

Hence I prefer to ride the bike in the city when visiting communities within the city or for any other office purpose.  It reduces the travel time by half, easily.  

Added to the traffic blues are the parking woes.  Hence bike travel is ideal. Of course, manoeuvring a bike through the erratic Indian traffic comes with its own risks! Everytime I ride the bike in the city I remember one of my former Rectors, while in the UK.  He loved to ride the bike, but he couldn't even imagine riding one in India!  

My basic take on the traffic issue is that the basic infrastructure is in place for a convenient and smooth travel.  Although there are some hiccups like road works, bottlenecks, potholes, and the encroachment of the pavement and even the main road by street vendors, these are not the worst contributors to the traffic.  What builds congestion and heavy traffic on our Indian roads is our driving habits.  We have rules, but none are respected, leave alone followed.  Our erratic driving skills contribute most to the heavy traffic on the city roads. 

That said, the same driving skills also sharpen our senses to a great extent!! For we need to drive not just using one's own mind, but all the while anticipating what the other drivers and riders on the road are thinking and going to do, while driving! 

Disconnect of the tongue

Like every other species on the earth, we humans too love to communicate... especially, by way of talking. So much so, for most of us prolonged silence is almost practically impossible. 

While that is the case of most of the population, there is a small portion of humanity which prefers to speak less.  Among this minority, there are few who barely speak at all. With people of such ability, conversation becomes very difficult. Then there are those whose silence cuts us off from even gauging what's going on in their mind.  

There are those rare few who speak very little but when they do speak they make utmost sense. Hence it is a joy to listen to them.  

A few people have a tongue that has a mind of its own.  Sooner than later, other realise how fickle such people can be.  

Then there are those whose tongue is totally disconnected from their mind; a total rapture of the nerve linking the tongue and the brain. I know of a handful of such and I stay away from them!  Worse still, if link to the heart is also missing!  Such people are toxic.  

Government bureaucracy

 I spent another futile afternoon today trying to sort out and bring to conclusion an issue about the property tax of one of our institutions.  It has been rolling around and never making much headway for the past 10 years.  

The assessment was miscalculated in 2016. This error was pointed out to the GHMC then itself. They officially, in writing, acknowledged their mistake and assured us that the correction would be done.  Then covid happened.  Two years later we got a fresh tax invoice with the old miscalculated amount - only this invoice also contained the penalty for non-payment, and interest on it too.  

We later found out that the file never made it to the Collector's office, where the final signature was to be affixed to confirm the correction.  So much for Indian bureaucracy!  

Now the tragedy is that for the failure of the government servants, we are to pay the hefty fine.  For the past four years, every month of March, there is some offer from the municipality and they raise our hopes that this issue would be addressed and we get to clear the backlogs - what we rightly need to pay.  The only consolation this year was that the official explaining to us was polite and honest to say that nothing can be done about the correction now.  Last year the official was rude and shameless, demanding that we pay up because 'you have money!'.  

The sad part of this kind of bureaucracy is that irrespective of who does the mistake or delay, the citizen has to bear the brunt of it all, in its totality. 

Another year of life

 Another year has gone by and I still don't claim to be any wiser!  More knowledge, yes. But not sure about deeper wisdom!  Nonetheless, am utterly GRATEFUL to everyone and everything that has come my way and assisted me in my growth. 

The morning was a good and very meaningful celebration with all from home attending Mass.  Mummy was the most moved of all!  I gather her fear is that I may not be looked after in my later years!  Hence she is closely watching how we take care of one another. I feel today's post-Mass spontaneous thanksgiving of hers was stemming from that same fear/assurance.  

Whatever it be, it was good to be celebrated... honestly and from the heart. 

Felicitations

 The art of impressing others is an feature present in most species, even in human beings. Nonetheless within the human species some individuals excel in this art. However there are some who overdo it, bordering or even crossing the threshold of nauseating flattery.

Among the priests and religious there is this tendency to felicitate and honour, often exaggerated, our Bishops, Provincials and General superiors. I personally have no issues with respecting persons, but not for holding positions or responsibilities. I'd rather respect and appreciate persons for their goodness, service and self-gift to others. 

Hence I would felicitate someone - or be felicitated myself - only and only AFTER someone has done some good; rather than taken charge of a role or begun a function! And that too, to be a genuine thanksgiving than a pompous show.

Religious discipline

Most of us look for motivation... mostly to stick to our goals and resolutions.  Hence the plethora of motivational talks and quotes that one finds on social media and whatsapp messages.  Nonetheless, what keeps one going is a commitment, a discipline, a consistent rhythm.  In that sense, motivation gets you going, but discipline keeps you growing.  

So I ask myself, is religious life and its principles, my motivation or a discipline? It ought to be a discipline.  Motivation can be temporary and not always available.  But what I can and should commit myself to is a discipline, a rhythm of life based on the Gospels.  

Life as a religious is no different from that of a sports person. Both the streams of life demand a certain stringent discipline, without which one gets no where and barely achieves anything worth at all.  Perhaps, just a difference of reason and purpose. A religious lives for God and people to whom he or she has committed his or her life to.  A sports person lives for the merit of the game. 

The beauty of this discipline is that when supported by love, it becomes a vocation; if not, it is an obsession.  

Developed India!

 Last month a couple of us were travelling by train and part of the discussion was about the progress the government claims to have made and all that political jargon. 

And at Rajamundry station we got hard evidence of it all... 

Coming around

 The luxury of choice in human life is vast and unimaginable.  We make choices every moment of our life. 

From picking up good looking vegetables, to people we choose to marry; from choosing to sleep an extra hour to deciding to quit a high-paying salary.  Even in moments when we seemingly feel we are not making a choice, for in the very act of not choosing either of the options, we CHOOSE not to act!  Whatever it be, each of those choices, has consequences and impact on our life.  

One amusing statement that I recently came across: You buy good potatoes and reject the bad ones. The bad ones return in your life through samosas, chat, burgers, chips...!