Young people; not youth

Reality is more important than ideas.  Unless one acknowledges this truth, we will only be living in a dreamland and never be able to make a meaningful impact on life itself.  

The simple fact, especially for us Salesians, is the notion of youth ministry.  However, youth is an abstract notion.  In reality there is no youth.  There are only young people.  And unless and until we interact with those young people, in person, in the concrete situations of our life (and their lives), our youth ministry would be excellent only paper but not in reality.  Our starting point has to be the young people immersed in their context. Starting with the abstract notion of youth will only lead us astray.  

Together with this fundamental truth, it is also equally important that we begin with the premise that we are going to encounter God in the young people, not get them back to God.  We do not have monopoly over God.  He is already present with the young in their situatedness. We only need to be open and available to Him, in and through the young - rather than approach the young as if we are the one's offering God to them! 

Prayer

My prayer on the feast of Don Bosco... (for myself!)
May I genuinely love the young, so much so that I do not have to 'proclaim' to them that I do so, but my mere presence announces my affection for them!  In this being carried out, I pray that I learn to be less of myself and constantly cherishing the Lord's presence with me.
Amen!

Urgency

Yesterday we celebrated the feast of Dominic Savio and today in the first reading of the Mass it was Stephen, the young man, who challenged the elders and priests of the times accusing them of murdering Jesus.  Both youngsters in the prime of their life.

In both of them one gets to see a sort of urgency.  A strange kind of recklessness.  No compromises. Nothing short of what is decided.  In Stephen's case, he does not resort to any diplomacy or sugar-talk in dealing with the elders of his time.  His words are direct and brave.  He is not waiting for the Romans to intervene and bring to justice those who falsely accused Jesus and put him to death.  He boldly attacks them, face to face. 

Some may call it imprudence.  Others may call it the power of the Spirit.  Whatever it be, it is a typical youth response: passionate, fearless and uncompromising. 

Romanian mosquito

Heard a story about a Romanian mosquito today...

Invigilating an exam hall of 241 students this morning was quite an adventure!  Ultimately had to report and pull up one youngster who had notes on him all along.  Initially I made sure that he was being watched.  But he continued peeking at the notes tucked in his jacket sleeve.  Then under the pretext of the hall already being warm, got him to hand me his jacket.  He did and I was pretty sure with that move I had taken away his means of cheating.  By this time, he knew that I knew!  Within 15 minutes I again noticed him fiddling with his shoe.  Very soon I saw him with (another?) note.  Going against all instructions and regulations I went upto him and gently whispered to him, "Either you stop it or hand it to me!"  From his indication, I gathered he would not resort to it again.  By this time I had already informed the supervisor of the hall that I was suspicious of him. 

No sooner I moved away from him, he was at it again!  This time round I informed the supervisor that he certainly had notes on him and that he knew that I was aware, and that he was carrying on referring to them, in spite of my gentle verbal warning.  I was told to keep a close eye on him.  Towards the end of the two hour exam I was asked to inform him to stay back after the exam.  I left an official note on his desk to stay hack after the exam.  An official from the student administration was there by the end. She asked me what happened and I was given a form to fill up.  The student was then interviewed and she found the notes exactly where I told her he had it: in his left shoe. 

After the whole episode, it took almost an hour for me to get over it.  I was feeling bad for having done it.  Not that I regretted doing it - but just that the lad seemed so desperate to copy.  I know not what action would be taken against him.  None in the exam invigilation team or the student administration were sure.  "It was not our job," they said, "to worry about the end of the process."  They were very impressed by my work in that large hall, especially this particular case - but I told them, it was no merit!  In fact, I said I was sorry for having to do it. None-the-less I did it - and would do it again, if necessary.  My reasoning was simple: Going against regulations, I warned him twice (the latter being direct and verbal).  In spite of that if he was brazen about the act, he should also be ready for the consequences.  He needed help and I did help him - first by trying to prevent him, then by directly telling him and finally by making him accountable. 

And yes, the story he tried to tell me when I led him to the toilet, halfway through the exam... "If you saw me scratching my wrist, that was because I was recently on a trip to Romania and there a mosquito bit me.  That's what was itching me!"  Well, I hope he did not tell the Admin officer that the same Romanian mosquito wrote and put that slip of paper in his sleeve or shoe too!  

Being at home with ourselves

While discussing with a group of members of the Salesian family about the notion of spiritual accompaniment of young people, it came across to me that the basic starting premise of our effort is that there is something not right with young people today!!  For me that is a dangerous launching pad.  We (the grown ups of today) have a 'problem' with the young of today - may not be a life and death problem but let's say, a difficulty.  I realized that our preceding generation had the same complain about us!!  Nothing very different.

The starting point of all our interactions with the young should be meeting them where they are - not where they 'should' be!  The way forward is not to become like them or make them like us.  We are the digital immigrants and no matter how hard we try we will never become digital natives.  Nor is any attempt to make the natives feel like immigrants of any real benefit.  The best way forward is to be with ourselves today.   Most of us do not know how to be ourselves, leave alone how to be be with God! In being happy and contended with ourselves and in our openness (non-judgemental attitude) to be with them lies the key to a harmonious future, both for us individuals and for our collective society.  

Muonic generation

Muons are part of electrons (themselves part of atoms and molecules).  However one specialty of these muons is that their lifespan is 220th fraction of a second.  One of the research students at the university doing her research on muons is trying to see the benefits of colliding muons.  Her first challenge is to get sufficient muons, enough to cause a collision, and most importantly 'prolong' their life to more than that minuscule fraction of a second, to actually make the collision happen!  One possibility she said was to speed up the muons to the speed of light, wherein time slows.  That way one could 'extend their lifespan'. 

Listening to Fr Louis Grech's talk on spiritual accompaniment of Generation z (the digital natives), I could not but see the great connection and similarities between muons and generation z.  The digital natives of today too are like muons.  Very short attention span, a pace of their own, exist in a world quite different from the rest, the interaction space is on another plane (the instant media, not even social media). So I was asking myself how can one 'extend' time with such a generation?  How to travel at the speed of light in order for that interaction to take place? 

Whatever be the pace and space inhabited by generation z, they too are flesh and blood.  They too have feelings, emotions, fears, anxieties, pain... I think it is in those times that time actually slows down for them.  That's the possibility of 'catching up with them'.  But this 'catching up with them' is not going to be possible if we have not had some accidental but meaningful interaction with them somewhere in 'their' world at some time. 

Gone are the days, at least in most of Europe, where the space of interacting with young people is a formal physical institution where they all are gathered and listening attentively to the words of a Salesian.  Or the young members of a youth club which meets every weekend or evening of a weekday.  Most youngsters today are members of groups, but all online. None physical. None geographical.  

Young people and the Church

Noteworthy signposts from the survey of young people with regard to vocational discernment, faith and Church (England and Wales)... I'm looking at these from the Indian scenario, for though the reality is slightly different, the situation back home will soon be the same as it is here.  The sooner we wake up and shape up, the better chance we stand at being relevant and meaningful.  Or else not only will young people be out of the church, the church will be out of their world as well!  In spite of the serious drawback that most of the 3,298 participants were mostly those who 'come to Church', the results offer some insights worth serious consideration:

• An accepting, non-judgemental environment is essential for young people to feel welcome in church settings.  So implicit, informal, friendly invitations are more effective than explicit stipulations that they should be present. 
• You have struck a chord with young people, if they invite their friends as well. 
• Church needs to move from being the conscience of the people to forming the conscience of the people. 
• The word 'vocation' has become toxic to some catholics as it seems too narrow in the way that it is used!  (As though only call to priestly and religious life are 'vocations' and the other life choices are not. And that the former are greater than the rest of vocations!). 

Clarity vs authenticity

A recent (2018) survey in England and Wales of the youth with regard to faith and vocational discernment, in view of the upcoming Synod has shed some insights into what young people feel about the Church.  Though the survey itself could have been broader in its reach, the available data does indicate a growing sense of divide within the Church, especially in the UK. 

The most significant of the findings that struck me was this particular insight that there are two distinct groups:  A small vocal and determined group looking back to an era they have been told was better and a much larger group who are embedded in the culture and want the Church to engage more.  The first group wants clarity and the second, authenticity. 

This is the case not just of the youth in England and Wales but of the whole Church and one of the principal reasons Pope Francis is being criticized.  There was a time when the Church offered clear and sure guidelines for everyone, including the civil society.  Its decisions were looked upto with respect and proved valuable.  However, this era is long gone!  Pope Francis too leaves things hanging!  But that's exactly how things are!  Things are no more pure black or white.  There are grey areas; ambiguous and unclear.  The Church does no good offering a 'permanent remedy'... certainly not from a position of authority and hierarchy.  The Church leaders need to journey with the whole world and seek for answers - not dictate them from the pulpit.  Answers or efforts to seek answers in such a collaborative mode are more appreciated and helpful than ready-made doctrinal replies. 

To use an imagery: There are those inside the Church waiting for your instructions.  Then there are those outside the Church happy to let you join them.  Where is the priest or the religious to go?  If he stays in, those outside are not going to wait for him for long.  They will gladly carry on their way and not ever bother about anything.  If he joins the group outside, those inside are not going to sit waiting for long.  They'll seek their answers elsewhere.  Stretched between these two groups, a priest/religious of today needs to find his mission. 

Teachers and guns: a nauseating combo

Recently Donald Trump, the US president strongly advocated arming the teachers to combat shootouts in schools!  At first I thought it was a joke!  But he was serious and sure about it producing better results: preventing any further shoot outs. His logic: any intruder will not dare step into a place where he knows he is going to be shot at.  However I realised I needed to put down my thoughts as to why this idea is not only bizarre, absurd but nauseating.  Apart from the evident political gain of upsetting the pro-gun lobby, why is this proposal wrong...

Education is meant to equip students with a sense of meaning and purpose for their life.  It is meant to help them form not just their heads but their hearts and hands as well.  If one overseeing such an endeavour is carrying a firearm what message does it carry for the students?? 

• That violence is normal.  Rather than advocate and work towards peace, the teacher becomes a living symbol of violence and fear.  In an era when physical punishment is seen as detrimental to the growth of the child, how can carrying a gun be seen as helpful?  
• Imagine the trauma of a child watch a teacher kill a student, a fellow classmate - however wrong the latter may be!  
• A teacher is not a soldier.  He or she is not moulded to take lives but build lives. Those teachers who laid down their lives saving their students from bullets are hailed as heroes.  That's what teachers do - save and help grow.  Not shoot and kill! 
• What if a disgruntled teacher decides to open fire in his or her classroom?  
• How does having more guns prevent shootouts?  The only thing it would lead to is an increase in the possibility of a shootout.  
• Rather than see how troubled children and youngsters can be helped to grow up healthy, the proposal suggests to eliminate them! 
  

While I sympathize with the parents, relatives and friends of those children and staff killed in the recent Florida school shootout, my heart also goes out to the youngster who carried out the brutal attack and his family.  The larger question that needs to be addressed is how does one ensure that young people do not end up so depressed that they have no other means than the gun to resort to? 

Enlivening liturgy

This morning's talk of Fr Hugh was about making the Eucharistic liturgy meaningful, especially for young people and children, following the example of Don Bosco himself. I was reminded of my days in Shillong, where occasionally I would be invited to animate groups of the YCS or YSM… all school or college going youngsters. The animation would always conclude with the Holy Mass. I remember ensuring that there was always something that the group had to do during Mass, in continuation of the animation and based on the readings of the Mass. It would be some enactment (of either of the readings) or a particular hymn or some action songs, or special intercessions or some small write-up … children always loved it and remembered those activities where they felt that they were part of the liturgy, not mere passive onlookers.

The danger is to swing to either extreme: be rigid about the rubrics or be creative just for the sake of novelty!

Torn jeans

Oh, the number of young people I came across today wearing torn jeans!! Whew!  Not only the number of them, but the literally ragged state of the pants!  I'd seen some students at Royal Holloway and it was fine. But in London, the number of them was way too many to count.

If only Mummy were to see this fashion statement, she'd have never ever got rid of my old jeans.  They way by far, usable for another generation - even after my use!  The jeans that I saw today were so 'torn' that Mummy would think twice to use as a mopping cloth or a doormat!  Such was their state!

Image is from the net!
I would never dare click a photo of any stranger, leave alone in such an attire!

Short skirts?

It has been brought to my notice that in Kerala, a bishop, exhorting his faithful to a spiritual life, through his pastoral newsletter recommended (among others) that girls should not wear short dresses to Church.  While certainly he has the good of his people and their spiritual growth at heart, he is perhaps focussing on some non-essentials.

That youngsters come to Church is itself a great sign of the growing faith.  To state that one should be dressed neatly and look dignified is one thing.  But the length of one's dress need not always be the standard measurement of one's character or spirituality.

While I do agree that many of the traditional practices have been a great help in building the Church and spreading the faith, I also believe that they need not be practiced merely because 'it has been so'. Rather those practices need to be explained in terms of contemporary context and made meaningful for today.

Moreover, would like to really know, whose problem is it if girls come with short skirts?  Of the girls themselves? Of boys? Of elders? Or of the parish priest himself?  I'm sure it is not of the girls themselves.  Well then, whose-so-ever else is the problem, they need to ask themselves what exactly is their problem?  The newsletter would do good to balance its statement on skirts with this issue too.  

Contemporary Need

I remember two weeks ago when I had accompanied Fr John and a group of youngsters for a retreat to Battersea.  After Steve explained the basic fire drill of the house and the keys and timings of the main door and all that stuff, he gave out the wifi password.  At that moment there was a sudden spurt of life in the group.  Till then they were there, passively listening.  The moment the wifi was mentioned it was 'aggressive listening'!

Contemporary individuals constantly rewrite the definition and chart of human needs.  Here's an amusing example (reworked Maslow's hierarchy of human needs):

With the young

The past two days, Saturday and Sunday I accompanied Fr John and a group of my college students for a retreat/pilgrimage in London.  We drove down together to Battersea and spent the morning in prayer and sharing.  In the afternoon we visited two historical churches (both Anglican) and then joined for Even Song at one.  Returning home we had Mass of the feast of Our Lady of Lourdes.  Long time was spent at the table sharing and talking. On Sunday we had b'fast and a meaningful Mass.  We then sat for a brief round of evaluation and then started back home.

More than a full-fledged retreat, it was more of an outing. But given the varied mixture of the group - 13 students from different nationalities and backgrounds - anything one emphasis would have been an extreme for the others.  Hence Fr John was right in trying to strike a balance - this being the first time he is trying this.

I like being with the group, most of whom I already knew through my earlier interactions with them.  Each one is very very different from the others.  Most often their outward talk and behaviour camouflages their inner depth.  In comparison with the youth of India, these youngsters are far more sociable and ready to interact with others and that too without much delay.  Moreover the content of their conversations is often rich and intense.  Of course, they do gossip about friends but it never has a negative tone or content.  

Swim against the tide

Message of the Rector Major (31 January 2017)

My dear young people of the entire Salesian world, dear girls and dear boys,
I greet you as a friend, brother and father; I address you this greeting on behalf of Don Bosco, as I come to you “knocking at the door of your life” on the occasion of the feast of our Beloved Father.

A few days ago Pope Francis wrote a letter to the youth on the occasion of the presentation of the document that will be used to prepare the XV Ordinary General Assembly of the Synod of Bishops, which will be held in October 2018. At the beginning of His letter, the Pope tells you, “I wanted you to be the centre of attention, because you are in my heart.” I know well, from my personal experience, what it means to carry you in my heart and to express every good wish, even if in many cases we have not yet had the possibility of greeting each other personally.

May I tell you something in confidence? Often, when I encounter you, young friends, in the various parts of the world and I must address you, I think what Don Bosco would tell you on behalf of Jesus. 

I am aware of the great diversity existing among you according to the nations and continents in which you live; diversities also of culture, diversities for the type of preparation for life, some with studies of vocational training or of qualification for a profession, others through university studies. I am aware that the situation of those who can count on human and economic resources to develop their talents is different from the one of those who lack these opportunities, etc. But I am convinced that your young hearts have so much to share and that, despite the differences, they are very similar to one another, and because of this I think I can address you a common message that reaches you wherever you are.

The message I send you today is in full harmony with the one that on various occasions Pope Francis asked you: “Dear Young Friends, I have confidence in you and I pray for you. Have the courage to ‘swim against the tide’.”

Many are the adults who have full confidence in you. I am one of them, my dear young friends, and I invite you to be courageous in your life. I spur you to have the strength to “swim against the tide”, when the call to be faithful to yourself and to Jesus resounds in your hearts.

Today the world needs you. It needs the great ideals that are proper of your youth and of your juvenile dreams. The world, now more than ever, is in need of young people who are full of hope and courage, who are not afraid of living, dreaming, looking for that authentic and profound happiness through which God dwells in your heart. Young people who have the will to commit themselves and who are capable of committing themselves and of loving “to the point of suffering”, as Mother Theresa of Calcutta, now a Saint, said. Young people who, under the spur of their commitment, are capable to donate their time and even to donate themselves.

Regretfully however, there are may young people who are “tired, bored or disappointed”, or young people who never felt enthusiastic for anything, young people who are week and frail. These youth need other youth; they need you who, speaking of the experience and with a language that comes from life, may show them that there are other ways and other possibilities. Young people who help them to really understand that fleeing from the challenges of life is never the solution; young people who also as true disciples-missionaries, help them to discover Jesus in their life and to believe in Him. A Jesus who, obviously, “does not sell you illusions”, but who offers Life, the authentic one, His own Life, His very Self.

I think, my dear youth, that on this 31st of January 2017 Don Bosco could tell you something so simple, with the words and language of today, as the Pope did in His letter: “Do not be afraid ... A better world can be built also as a result of your efforts, your desire to change and your generosity. Do not be afraid to listen to the Spirit who proposes bold choices; do not delay when your conscience asks you to take risks in following the Master.”

I wish with all my heart that it may be so for you: that you may be capable to risk, when it comes to Jesus and to God the Father in your life. You will never lack his Presence through the Spirit and it will be a certain guarantee for your human journey of happiness. I greet you with sincere affection and wish you a happy feast of Don Bosco and the ever maternal protection of our Mother help of Christians.

Fr Angel Fernandez (Rector Major)

Novena to Don Bosco: Call to Holiness

Novena to Don Bosco

(Remembering DON BOSCO and the significant people who shaped his life and works)

Day 9: Jesus Christ 

(His Master) 

CALL TO HOLINESS

Don Bosco's whole work for the boys was the result of a personal call from Jesus. God was above all else and the real cause of his initiatives. Don Bosco's sole concern was the welfare of his boys: Da mihi animas, cetera tolle (Give me souls, take away the rest).

Sanctity is easy. 

Don Bosco's often repeated words to his boys 

In Don Bosco, the extraordinary becomes ordinary. 

Words of Pope Pius XI while speaking about the way Don Bosco lived his holiness in the most humble and practical manner. 

Holiness is the best gift we can give to our young people. 

Said by Fr Pascual Chavez, the 9th successor of Don Bosco, in imitation of our founder who not only was saintly himself but made those in contact with him saints, as well. 

While at prayer one time, Don Bosco was interrupted by the visit of a wealthy noble. “Tell him I'll be there soon,” he said, and he continued his prayers. Three times he was called. Finally he went. “My dear Sir,” he said, you are a good friend of mine, but God comes first.
(Click here to download the pdf file for display)

Novena to Don Bosco: Reason for our Existence

Novena to Don Bosco

(Remembering DON BOSCO and the significant people who shaped his life and works) 

Day 7: Youth 

(His Heartbeat) 

REASON FOR OUR EXISTENCE 

“... that part of the human society which is so exposed and yet so rich in promise.” 

(Constitutions of the Society of St Francis De Sales, No. 1) 

I owe you my life. Be sure of it: from now on I will spend it entirely for you. 

Don Bosco's solemn perpetual promise soon after he miraculously recovered, from certain death in 1846... thanks to the fervent prayers and wishes of his 'dirty little rascals'. 

For you I study, for you I work, for you I live, for you I am even ready to give my life. 

Don Bosco's words to his poor boys, those under his care and for whom he was willing to go to any length. 

Don Bosco used to go begging in the city of Turin for the maintenance of his poor boys. At one place, when Don Bosco extended his hand asking for some help for his boys, the man spat on it. "This is for me," Don Bosco said calmly and extending the other hand, said... "Now for my poor boys!" The other person was so touched, that he remained a generous benefactor of Don Bosco all his life.
(Click here to download the pdf file for display)

Learning from St Francis de Sales

Today we commemorate the feast of St Francis de Sales.  Besides being the founder of the MSFS, he is venerated as the patron of the Salesians of Don Bosco.

Stained glass arcade of St Francis de Sales at Saint Paul Catholic Church (Westerville, Ohio)

When Don Bosco founded his congregation for the youth at risk, his natural choice of St Francis de Sales was not an impromptu decision.  It was out of a personal and historical resonance with the Saint that made Don Bosco propose St Francis de Sales as the patron.  Of all the virtues of St Francis, what attracted Don Bosco and something which moulded his own life, was the virtue of self-discipline.  St Francis is renowned for his gentleness and meekness. However, he was not 'born' with those virtues.  He had to strive to excel in them.  Don Bosco was much worse.  He was short-tempered, rebellious, hard-headed and as stubborn as a mule.  Don Bosco himself acknowledges these vices in his life.  And with this baggage he could not have done much for the kids to whom he was keen to reach out to.  For they too were of similar character!  Don Bosco then makes the difficult choice: to change himself in order to be useful to the boys whom he loved most. In this arduous task of working on oneself, he chose St Francis de Sales.  Though, honestly speaking, he did not have as much a success as did St Francis, but there was considerable change.

Sunday Mass

It is exactly two weeks since I landed in London and in these two weeks, I've attended the Sunday Mass in two different places. The first Sunday I went along with Fr John to the University Chapel.  There were about 50 people, with half of them from the neighbourhood and the rest, students of the University.  Yesterday I went to the adjacent Salesian Parish. Nearly 60% were elderly and the rest were young couples with small children. There was hardly any teenager or youngster at all!

Heartwarming it was to see the young parents come along with their children and the church is always noisy - even during Mass.  Yesterday sitting before me was a family of five: parents and three children.  They reminded me of my nephew very much because one of the boys had a book on trucks and the other had a small toy car to which he clung all through. Must be identity twins of my nephew back in India!

But where are the young people???  Is it that they have all the 'interesting' things planned only for Sundays in this part of the world or is it that Mass is no more 'interesting' or meaningful at all?

Catholic Church of St Anne, Chertsey (London)

Whom did Don Bosco want?

I have been time and again telling this at every opportunity to the young who are with us for becoming Salesians: Don Bosco did not want priests or brothers, he wanted anyone and everyone for young people.  His concern and only concern was the youngsters.  Nothing else mattered to him, certainly not priests or brothers or where they came from.

In our holy founder's thinking there is clearly a social concern.  I think we could justly speak of a kind of 'lay style' in our congregation as we take stock of the history of its founding, the unique life Don Bosco had in mind, and the very nature of the mission he chose.

... Don Bosco's intention to set up "a vast apostolic movement for youth and the masses," the chapter on extern Salesians in the first editions of the Constitutions (1860-1874), and the new style with regard to flexibility of structure, ownership of goods, religious garb, adaptability, family spirit, secular terminology, special fields of apostolate and working class circumstances.