Balancing

 Never came across this version of the text of St Paul... (to the 2nd Corinthians)

Remember how generous the Lord Jesus was: he was rich, but he became poor for your sake, to make you rich out of his poverty.  This does not mean that to give relief to others you ought to make things difficult for yourselves: it is a question of balancing what happens to be your surplus now against their present need, and one day they may have something to spare that will supply your own need. That is how we strike a balance: The man who gathered much had none too much, the man who gathered little did not go short. 

Humanity, a reality we share-in

Humanity is a reality we being humans share-in, rather than contribute-towards.  

When speaking of in terms of contributing-towards, the drawback is that if one does not contribute towards it the total is less by that single contribution.  The deficiency in humanity is due to those not contributing towards its total pool.  As such what is diminished is the overall humanity - not the individual self who did not contribute towards it.  On the other hand, when speaking of in terms of 'share-in' when one does not share-in the existing realm of humanity what is impoverished is not the reality of humanity itself but the individual who desists sharing-in.  

However, two misconceptions that can arise when we speak of 'share-in': that humanity pre-dates us  and that it is something that exists by itself (pre-existing and independent of ourselves).  Transcendent?  The reality is exactly opposite - humanity does not transcend human borders. It is only within the realm of human beings that one can speak of humanity.  It is true that one can speak of humanity being inspired by the divine or humanity reaching out to the animals, but these are aspects where humanity is relating to rather than 'leaving' the boundary of us human beings.  The sum total of humanity - a very bad way of putting it - evaporates into thin air without us, human beings.  

Another aspect: sharing-in incorporates contributing-towards.  The other way need not always be possible or effective.  The fact that I share-in something will naturally lead me to contribute-towards it - in and through innovative ways.  The fact that I contribute-towards need not always mean I fully and whole-heartedly associate with it or see that which I contribute towards as integral to my identity.  Eg.: volunteering vs random acts of charity.  

Now as to why this thought kept plaguing me this morning:  Can I speak of language too in this manner?

Jesus the migrant

One thought that has recurred in my mind this advent is the fact that the one whose birthday we celebrate, the feast which practically means so much for most of the western world, Christmas which means so much to so many in so many different ways is actually the celebration of a migrant birth!!  

That Jesus was born outside his own home, his own parent's house, that too in a stable, a lowly place considered fit only for domestic animals, is so often repeated in our sermons and reflections, but we can sum it all into one word: being a migrant, a refugee, a stranger in a lowly and lonely place.  Amazingly we celebrate this birth with such great festivities, yet choose not to be disturbed by the way we treat the stranger and the lonely, the 'other'.  

Not just the child Jesus, but practically every other Biblical character was a refugee, a migrant at some crucial point of his or her life, if not the entire life itself: Abraham was on the move, after he thought he had set his roots,  Moses had to flee from his brother, Joseph was sold into slavery and imprisoned in Egypt... why, even Adam was evicted from his first home, by none other than God himself!! 

While there are numerous generous and noble people today (as in times before) who open their hands and hearts to the migrants and refugees, it is alarming to see the modern world speckled with countless refugee camps and agonising immigration processes that dehumanise persons - most often, in the name of securing the dignity of other human beings.  

So I ask myself, how justified am I everytime I claim something as 'mine'... my land, my home, my property, my inheritance, my rights... what is the cost of making something 'mine'?  Can there be a 'mine' wherein the other is not denied 'his'?  How do I happily make the journey from 'mine' to 'ours'? 

Generous sharing

One the foremost community characteristics of the early Christian community was the sharing aspect of its individual members.  They really took care of those in need.  Those with plenty or enough to spare did not mind putting their excess at the disposal of the elders to be given away to those who really haven't much or anything at all. 

This generosity does not necessarily and merely stem from a sense of pity or abundance.  At the root of this generous sharing is the sense of unity, of oneness and equality.  Those with plenty did not feel bad about giving away something and those with little did not hesitate to come forward and appeal for help.  Everyone, rich and poor, haves and have-nots felt at home with one another.  That being at home with one another was the Church! 

Moreover it was basically this community dimension that appealed most to the believers of other faiths.  The joy and serenity that they noticed among the Christians made them wonder what is it that they had going on among them.  How is it that this group of people could feel happy about giving away - generously - what was legally and rightfully theirs?  Why was there this feeling of 'being-at-home'? 

If it was this community sharing and concern that brought the people together, it was the Gospel message that strengthened the bond and deepened it, complementing charity with divinity. 

Two rules

Words of a wise man to someone who really is busy with his or her work:
Just two rules:

1. Do not do today what you can do tomorrow. 
2. Do not work alone; that what can be shared with others, or something others are willing and happy to do with you, share. 

Of Divine providence and play

Initially when I joined the Salesians I was surprised to hear from the elderly Salesians that most of our benefactors were actually poor people - some much poorer than us Salesians whom they were helping!!  Only then the gospel of the widow putting in her two pence, her entire earnings, made profound meaning to me. 

The readings of the day from the book of the Kings, about Elijah the prophet and the widow, offer a similar insight.   Elijah is told by Yahweh that he has instructed a widow to cater to his food.  And who is this widow? A wealthy aristocrat? Not at all!  She is so poor that she has only one meal left and on the brink of starvation!  Yet she agrees to share the food, the only food she has, all that she has, with a total stranger. 

God continues to play tricks: initially by designating her to share her only meal with a stranger and then by never letting her jar of flour and jug of oil go empty!  And what's Elijay doing?  What he is designated to do!

Expressing oneself

One of the advantages of social media, besides anonymity, is the possibility to express oneself without adhering to theories of scientific truth and error or abiding by public/popular/actual rhetoric.  In other words, anyone can express oneself without being felt compelled by the accepted or prevalent norm.  One is merely expressing oneself.  There is no demand for logic, reason or arguments to support one's statement(s) - at least one need not oblige. 

In one sense this can be a very dangerous endeavour.  One can deny total responsibility for what one has just stated and offer no explanation or sensible justification for either.  That can lead to serious personality disorders which affect not just the individual concerned but all those associated with him or her. 

On the other hand, it can be seen as a psychological letting off of steam.  A sort of therapy wherein one merely expresses one's opinion.  Not necessarily a judgement or conclusion.  A catharsis. 

All the same the balance or the line dividing the two can at times be very thin and slippery.   

Rendering meaning

The dilemma of whether to use or not to use language is such that even to express its 'murderous' nature, we use it.  An interesting article on the meaningfulness of greeting cards inspite of them using cliches or outdated phrases...

Clichéd statements such as ‘I love you’ and ‘Sorry for your loss’ call attention to this double futility: language always fails but it is impossible to remain silent. Nowhere is this clearer than in the sympathy card phrase ‘There are no words’. Though the statement is true, in order to be given meaning it must be expressed and, in doing so, is falsified. This axis of articulation and absence, of speaking and silence, is the dilemma that language continually re-presents.

[Source: Aeon]

Vulnerability and community building

People often say that trust is the bonding factor in a relationship.  In religious life too trust plays a very important role in building communities and lasting bonds.  However,  I also believe that prior to trust it is vulnerability that plays a crucial role.  Not just being vulnerable but recognising and having the courage to acknowledge that vulnerability to those whom I live with.  That indeed is risky and dangerous.  But there are no short cuts to forming real relationships.

Very often we as religious are reluctant to share our vulnerabilities.  No one feels great or is pleased to share one's own weaknesses.  All our achievements and strengths are broadcast but the weaknesses and failures we keep them private.  That is natural.  But in order to gain someone's trust the best way is to share with the person something personal, so that the person feels that the other is not just mouthing good things but sharing something of his or her own self.  What often keeps us from sharing our weaknesses from one another is the fear that the other may use them against me or make them public.  Genuine fears but mostly prejudiced. 

I've seen myself the strength of confreres working together once they have bonded well.  Individually they may not be exceptionally talented or gifted but once they learn to trust each other, we complement one another and the tasks at hand become adventures.  Communities that are willing to sit and share, talk, exchange not just plans and ideas but feelings, emotions and requests for help, have a greater degree of strength and effectiveness in apostolate.  The element of witness is truly inspirational. 

The true miracle

Reflection for April 28 (Multiplication of the loaves)

An alternative interpretation of this text of the multiplication of the loaves and fish suggests that the real miracle was not of 'creating' bread and fish, but of 'opening' the hearts and minds of all those gathered to share the little they had. So the miracle is more about sharing than creating.

Everyone gathered from afar would certainly have had something to eat. However, it would have been only for themselves. If a small boy could have so much (five loaves and 2 fish) how much more would each adult have! The miracle begins when that small boy generously comes forward to share what he had. All that Jesus does is opens the hearts of each one to share with others whatever they had. The result: not only is there enough for everyone, there is also much leftover.

In our world today there is enough for everyone to eat, drink and grow healthy, fit and strong. However, it is most often the greed of a few that causes starvation and deprivation. Jesus is always with us. We only need to open our hearts in generosity with the little we have to those around us, He will do the rest.

Proclaim... the experience

Reflection for April 25

“Go proclaim...”

The directive to 'proclaim' the Gospel is a straight-forward one. It is a matter of reaching the Good News to all. Interestingly this message does not necessarily mean only the written text. Much more than that it is the personally experienced Jesus that is the real Good News. The command is from Jesus Himself, only later to be written down by the authors.

The apostles are directed by the risen Lord to share with others everything they learned with and through Him, experienced Him, saw Him do and heard Him say. They are directed to share that message enlivened by the passion of their thrill of having had that first hand experience of Jesus.

Proclamation, therefore, becomes primarily a sharing of an experience of the Lord, and not merely a description of the written word.

Depth

From my little experience of dealing with people of UK, I suspect there is an element of fear and anxiety underlying any attempt to touch upon deep personal matters. Not that elsewhere people go about shouting their inner feelings and emotions in the street.  But in comparison, there seems to be a sort of block, a sort of veil which everyone is comfortable with.

The few who do dare speak of their inner turmoils and share their feelings are often considered and treated as traditionalists or religious - someone to be kept away from!  Most consider it fashionable and modern to be 'trendy', to be superfluous.  Thus the avoidance of shared silence, deep intimate relationships, that extra effort to retain relationships, conversations involving feelings (rather than merely intellectual stuff or swearing), sharing of personal space and emotions... A note on silence: it is not that people appreciate silence. They do - that too fiercely. It is more as a tool to close up oneself, shutting out others, rather than shared silence.

I'm not judging, neither the people nor the situation, but merely trying to understand.  Certainly, it is not the case that every person or situation is in this state - but a sort of general ambiance.  Surely there must be several reasons for such an ambiance to be created.  Wonder what could be the predominant ones that led to this state of affairs.  Or I may be reading the signs differently.  Possible.

Sharing... from the heart

While our sharing based on our reflections on the Salesian Constitutions was good, it brought back to my mind some of the earlier sharings I was involved in, with members of my community wherever I was during my earlier years.

There was a time when I was 'all head' and would feel odd about people sharing their feelings and sentiments.  I considered them as not strong people or those incapable of 'delving deep' into something profound.  However over the years my perception has changed and today I hold quite the contradictory position.  To share something of one's own feelings and emotions in all honesty require a great amount of courage and maturity.  Only those who have a genuinely large heart for the group and are at home with the group and themselves can do so.

To expose one's vulnerabilities before others, one's own family members, does not make one more feeble or guilty; it actually strengthens one from within.  Done in an ambiance of sincerity and openness, it gives one the courage to face difficulties, no more as individuals but as persons who enjoy the support and cooperation of a 'family'.

Once we taste this sort of sharing when in a small close knit group of persons, a very sound theological or doctrinal exposition of a concept does not touch anyone as much as a downcast look or a brief pause after narration of a very personal experience.

A different way of being the Church...

Today's Gospel is about Jesus "multiplying" the food and feeding the five thousand.  Interestingly the words Jesus uses in this event are used in the Holy Eucharist during the moment of consecration.

The boy is happy to share...!

Perhaps this is how the Holy Mass should have originally been.  It is hard to even imagine how different Christianity and the Church would have been if only we had adopted this "event" or instance as the model of our liturgical Eucharistic celebration.
... an open space (open for all, no walls, boundaries, anyone feeling they are not welcome)
... the miracle of sharing (in contrast to the Priest 'feeding' or each one 'gaining' something)
... the participation of everyone (against the solo performance of the Priest or the choir)
... the context and the ambiance of natural everyday living (rather than the paraphernalia of liturgy... vestments, ornamental altar and all that is put on it, the ruberics,...)

Small pockets but large hearts

Last night commenting on the parable of the multiplication of loaves by Jesus, Fr Palli offered the boys another version of the 'miracle'.  He said that perhaps Jesus did not really 'multiply' bread and fish.  But how then did the five thousand men eat to their fill?  Well, they certainly had their own tiffin boxes and carriages.  All that Jesus really did was touch their hearts to help them be generous enough to share with all what each one already had.  Thus not only was the food sufficient but there was extra/left overs too.

He concluded his goodnight thought saying: Even if the pocket is small but the heart is big, wondrous things can be done!

I guess this is the real story of most of our benefactors.  People with small pockets but large hearts!

Sharing rather than purchasing

This evening after supper we had a short get-together and sharing of Christmas gifts. Sometime midway through Advent, each one picked up a name from the community list at random and was asked to specially pray for the person during the season.  Before breaking up for the holidays we were reminded to get a small gift for the person, on our return from home.

Most ´bought´ gifts.  I would have preferred each one to share something we had with us rather than purchase something.  The rationale being, the money is not ours, earned either by the benefactors or my parents.  Rather when I share something I have and find it useful, I am giving a part of myself. This makes the gift something ´personal´.  Of course, some may say, the gift is not a brand new thing, rather it is something ´second-hand´. However, I believe the attitude of sharing is the crux. The rest is always debatable.

Living OUR lives

While thinking of my views and opinions about others, especially those in the community, I remembered reading something in the book The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho:

When someone sees the same people every day, they wind up becoming a part of that person's life.  And then they want the person to change. If someone isn't what others want them to be, the others become angry.  Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.  

This is very true of us religious living in a community, especially the last bit of insight.  But then I asked myself, how do married people live? Say, my parents or my brother's family?  They share their life with the same person till the end of their lives.  We religious at least have our annual transfers! The key, not to solve the issue, but to understand one another better is, communication... an open and sincere sharing of views wherein I talk as well as am willing to listen.  Lacking in which I only keep creating an ideal confrere while the real confrere is not really listened to. 

Real poverty hurts

I read the message of Pope Francis for this season of Lent today.  It speaks of his reminder about poverty and sharing.  It recalls us to the fact that Christ enriched us not in his riches or heavenly state but in His utter poverty.  Most of the message draws on the Scriptures but what really caught my attention was his 'plain' talk towards the end.  Somewhere just before concluding he states

Let us not forget that real poverty hurts: no self-denial is real without this dimension of penance. I distrust a charity that costs nothing and does not hurt. 

Very strong and true words.
Earlier in the message he subtly differentiates a charity born of abundance and even a sense of altruism and piety from the kind of charity that stems from being one in all aspects of life and living - from a sense of 'real poverty'. 

You may be the only Bible...

Is 49: 3. 5-6/ Ps 40: 2. 4. 7-8. 8-9. 10 (8a. 9a)/ 1 Cor 1: 1-3/ Jn 1: 29-34

Look, there is the lamb of God... (Jn 1: 29)

Two men traveling by a long-distance train were discussing the evil and corruption in the world. After a while, one of them, a Catholic, gave the other a copy of the Gospels. After reading a while, the other said, “You Catholics are the cause of this confusion. You have the remedy but you don't share!” Isaiah, Paul and John the Baptist were all fearless witnesses of the Lord. Am I a joyful and convinced witness or a secret admirer of the Lord?

You may be the only Bible some will ever read.

Faith-building Friendship

1 Sm 8: 4-7. 10-22a/ Ps 89: 16-17. 18-19/ Mk 2: 1-12

Seeing their faith, Jesus said to the paralytic, “My child, your sins are forgiven.” (Mk 2: 5)

A woman who was loosing her ability to speak due to cancer enrolled herself for a sign language class. And so did her husband, four children, two sisters, brother, mother, father and twelve close friends! They loved her dearly and wanted to continue communicating with her when she could no longer speak.

The friendship of the four pall-bearers would not have been so strong and unanimous, hadn't the paralytic done and been a true friend to them. Seeing their friendship and loyalty, Jesus recognizes the goodwill of the bed-ridden man. Is our friendship faith-building or mere chit-chat?

No greater love a man can have than to lay down his life for his friends (Jn 15: 13)