Desire and suffering

 The Buddhist philosophy directly and squarely places the blame of suffering on desire.  It is desire that is the root of all suffering.  Take desire off the equation, all suffering also ends.  

Although it may sound too dire or exaggerated, there is a great sense of wisdom in it.  The Buddhist thought rationally helps one understand this connection between human desire and untold suffering prevalent in the world, especially in one's own personal life. Therefore Buddha's own simple path: detachment.  No desire or attachment towards anything at all - not even detachment itself!  

The greater the plans and ambitions, the greater the toil and the consequent joy (on fulfilling the plan) or suffering (at failing to live out the plan).  And the comedy of human life is such that no matter what the outcome of the plan, we don't give up desiring!!  At the most, we desire something else.  But never do we totally renounce everything!  Perhaps this counter dimension is what Arthur Schopenhauer was driving at. 

These are the most rabid thoughts playing out on my mind, as we enter a week-long string of meetings.  We have mega plans, and I personally am almost certain that we are biting more than what we can chew.  So I'm not pinning my hopes on achieving much, leave along even to convince our confreres of half of what we want them to change or plan for this academic year.  Nonetheless, there is also a sense of calmness within, that what we are doing is truly a selfless animation for the good of the province. And that it is God's work, so he's actually responsible.  If he has other plans, I'd rather be open to his plan rather than stubbornly hold on to what I hold clear and sure. 

Religious poverty

The notion of living and working for the poor, as a religious who takes the vow of poverty, is always a very conveniently moulded construct.  We interpret poverty to mean detachment.  And then possess everything that a middle-class family or even the rich have!  

I still vividly remember having this discussion with Benji during my novitiate asking him what right or privilege do I have to stay in this newly built novitiate while the ones who built it are still living in huts, right in front of the house.  He then told me, "To work you need strength and energy.  That's why you have food that will nourish you and a bed that lets you have sufficient rest." I wasn't really convinced then, neither am I still!  

To work with and for the poor, one really has to be poor.  The concept that in order to help someone rise out of poverty we have to be above poverty ourselves, stems from a misplaced concept of helping those poor to get into the middle class and above.  Our primary job is not to help the poor transition to the upper levels of economic status.  Our job is to show and be God's love for them!  To show by word and deed that God loves, that he loves especially the poor.  This means to stand by them.  With them!  Not above or apart from them.  

Nothing to lose

When questioned by the religious elders, Peter and his company, boldly assert their source of strength and stand by their teaching of Jesus risen.  No mincing words, no ifs and buts.  Simple, plain, direct, acknowledgement of Christ risen and total allegiance to His life and works. 

Besides the Holy Spirit, it was also their freedom from any other aspect of life that helped them preach Jesus.  They literally had nothing to lose!  All that they had, they shared!  Even Jesus.  So no compromises, no calculations, no measuring pros and cons.  That's the power of detachment.  It gives one the freedom to choose ones path, without any fear of loss. 

It is exactly this freedom of detachment and choice that we religious have.  But we fail to make the most of it, because we fear risking the other elements and aspects we have 'gathered' in the process of living like Christ - all 'for' living like Christ.  

When I'm weak, then I'm strong

One of the many Biblical paradoxes: when I am weak, then I am strong. A very good meditation on humility and openness.  The weakness experience here is not oppressive, even though it is meant to be.  The weakness does not prevent one from buckling, even though that is exactly what weakness is all about.  Rather, in those moments of struggle and giving in, we feel strong enough to carry on.  Rather than give in, feel the urge to keep going. 

However for me to really experience that I need to be doing what God wants me to do;  furthermore, not my work, but His work. So it is not me doing His work, it is me sharing in His endeavours.  Therefore the task is not mine alone nor am I totally indifferent about the work ("not my responsibility").  I have the strength because I'm not alone; because he who has entrusted me with a task, is taking the major responsibility and I have only to accompany; because the achievement of result is not my goal, making the best of efforts is. 

The challenge is for me to be humble and open enough to see that I'm not in this alone.  There are others, there are well-wishers, friends, guides, confreres, loved ones... there is God.

Dating God can be a nightmare!

A couple of days ago, the incident of a group of priests being asked to leave the pub because the doorman assumed them to be members of a stag party, wearing clerical habit, hit the news and has since become quite a sensation.  However, what surprised me more than the event itself was the news article published in the Daily Mail a few days ago.  Now the Daily Mail is anything but serious news is known to everyone.  Most often it is sleaze and gossip.  But for it to run an article stating why these men chose to be priests was quite amazing and really stood out for me.  I only happened to by chance come upon the article for I rarely pick up this particular newspaper, except for the daily sudoku, crossword and scrabble.

Here are a few points that stood out for me, most significantly about the recruitment and formation of priests:

• The expense of training a young man to be a priest is enormous and lengthy.  Is the person we have after ordination, really worth the expense and time and energy spent all along?  For the time, money and energy invested, what sort of person should this be?  What quality and mettle would this person be made of by the time of his ordination?  
• These men are different but not totally ignorant of the world in which they live and work.  They are people totally immersed in its everyday life.  Now that includes movies, TV shows, popular celebrities, trending talks and videos, ... they may not be huge fans of any but they certainly know it all.  They are not ignorant 'saints' who live in some fantasy world.  They've seen the world - they continue to know the world.  
• The influence of inspirational models ... (in the case of most of these priests, the life and death of John Paul II) it is enormous.  They may not be perpetual models of inspiration, but the trigger they offer in knowing more of Christ and the Church is sufficient enough to 'seduce' them for life. 
• When scandal and mistakes of past haunt the present it is easy to become depressed or even totally avoid or even label the whole church as 'bad'.  The alternative, choose to become 'good'. 
• All of these young men had great opportunities for a career in the world.  They did have high-paying jobs.  Yet they gave it up for they truly felt called for something other than career and money.  Now as priests earning a pittance compared to what they earlier earned, they have no regrets about the money.  The contentment is evident in what you have at hand.  
• What we give up as priests and religious are essential elements of human nature.  But everyone makes sacrifices - even married people.  And are happy to do so.  So it is not what we give up that matters most, but with what attitude we give up what we sacrifice that counts. 
• Liked the comment of one of the priests: We are dating God, building a relationship.  And ...dating God can be a nightmare! 

Read the whole article here.

Novena to Don Bosco: Detachment

Novena to Don Bosco

(Remembering DON BOSCO and the significant people who shaped his life and works)

Day 4: Fr Borel
(First Helper of Don Bosco)

DETACHMENT 

Fr Borel, the first one to help Don Bosco at the Oratory, when the latter began to work solely for his poor boys. He was a good, short, simple and popular Diocesan Priest. He was affectionately called the 'little priest' because of his short stature. However, he inspired Don Bosco through his selfless and tireless hardwork. 

If you really love your boys, you must be ready to make this sacrifice too. 

Words of encouragement given by Fr Borel to Don Bosco, in 1844, when the oratory was in its infancy and Don Bosco had to go around begging for money. 

He appeared to be a little priest not counting for much, but ten good priests could hardly have done the good that this great servant of God has done. 

Words uttered by a weeping Don Bosco while Fr Borel was on his deathbed on September 9, 1873. 

Fr Borel was so generous and detached that on his deathbed he had nothing in his possession, not even enough money for his own funeral.  

(Click here to download the pdf file for display)

Those who run across the sea...

A quote from a very refreshing new perspective of Nietzsche's philosophy... as that inspired and founded on the philosophy of Herodotus.  Honestly I've never even heard the name of the latter Greek philosopher of the 5th century BC.  But much of what was spoken today by Prof Raymond Geuss  looked sensible and logical.

Those who run across the sea change the sky above them, but not their own internal dispositions (Seneca, Ep. Mor. 17, 12).

It was proposed as a critique of what Herodotus and Nietzsche in a way wish philosophy would actually do: help one view one's own home as a travelling stranger.  For this, the example is Herodotus who travelled far and wide and with prejudice to none!

The idea was that introspection is actually not the ideal for self-knowledge - a direct contrast to the dominant thought, right since the time of Plato.  The alternative proposed: viewing oneself through the eyes of a travelling foreigner.  (There are other implications and conditions involved). 

Attachment to things

Learn more about the 'endowment effect' that makes us cling onto our material possessions...
interesting to note also that it is possible to grow without being affected by this 'endowment effect'

Lens: At home... always!

Here's another liner from the autobiography of Fr Lens':

My first visit to Belgium was in 1959, after 10 years in India, six years after my ordination.

I wonder how many of us would dare live with that detachment and commitment today.  Some may say that it was the spirituality of those times... being totally away from home.  But those of us who had the fortune of knowing Fr Lens, know all too well that he was AT home, always, wherever he was! 

Faith

Faith is often spoken of as something that we need to grow in.  Something that we need to have in order to be good Christians and all the more, good religious.  It is classically defined as believing in what you do not see or affirming something that is apparently absent.

However, I think faith is also about letting go. It is about realizing that it is not I who have to hold on to God, but letting go of everything with the assurance that God will hold me!  So I ask myself, does faith also include letting go of God himself?  In a sense, yes! Because it not ultimately me 'saving' God for myself but God 'embracing me'.  

Poverty vs Poverty

I remember during one of the meetings in the Provincial house, while discussing about our life of poverty and the corresponding lifestyle that we live, Fr Sebastian John made a very strong point. He said that in the Indian context when we say that we are like the Hindu sanyasis, it is actually a very very contradictory imagery we are providing.  The Hindu sanyasi when he leaves home, he leaves everything: attachment to his family, material possessions, family inheritance, every comfort of the world.  He is practically a beggar on the street, living his life day to day on the charity of others.

In such a context, when we say that we have left behind everything for the congregation and Don Bosco, it is actually a farce!  We do leave our own families... but build up relations with the community members and call them our 'family'; neither are we totally cut off from our natural families altogether.  We say we have given up our family inheritance... but we lack nothing!  We live a comfortable life, assured that the congregation will take care of our every need.  We have buildings to live in (not a small house); separate individual rooms, meals all round the clock, vehicles for our conveyance, domestic helpers to do our work (not only the work of the community)...

And the fact of not owning anything? Well the tons of lugguage we chug along when we move from house to house when on transfer, in contrast to the small 'potli' (sack) a sanyasi owns, speaks for itself.  

The burning bush

Very many of us in our enthusiasm for God and our piety long to witness God in the burning bush...I guess this is also the very basic reason of all pilgrimages undertaken.  However, we miss or desist with all our might to be the burning bush ourselves!  Ablaze with God ... for oneself and others!

We are frightened that we would turn to ashes and none would even notice us - neither the bright light nor the residual ashes.  Therefore we prefer to remain a pleasant looking, safe and secure bush. We totally forget that the burning bush never lost itself!  It never got burnt down.  

Real fasting

Fasting is often seen as a powerful weapon in our spiritual journey towards God. However, it is not something very pleasant or something habitual. It becomes all the more burdensome when we are doing it as a bargain chip with God for something we need from Him. The real fast would be the one wherein we are willing to give up anything, not just food or drink, because we hunger for God.

My mission? Really?

1 Sm 1: 1-8/ Ps 116: 12-13. 14-17. 18-19/ Mk 1: 14-20

… at once they left their nets and followed Him (Mk 1: 18)

It is certainly possible that before Jesus called Simon, Andrew, James and John, they had heard of him. They certainly would have given a thought to what Jesus had preached and so when His invitation reached them, they accepted it instantly. Each one of us called by the Lord. Have we heard of what He wants of us? Have we given that a thought? Or have I presumed something without ever listening, or verifying that what I believe as my mission is actually what the Lord wants of me?

Detachment is the key

The readings of the day (from Sirach and Mark) speak of repentance (return to him) and charity (go sell all you have). I was wondering what could be the connection between the two values.  What does  repenting from my sins and selling all I possess have in common?  During meditation it struck me that the common denominator here is detachment.  I need to detach myself from all my sins as well as all that keeps me bound.  As long I am detached from anything that binds me, I'm fine.  Anything that binds me, my sins, my attachments to wealth, even clinging to virtues and goodness, is evil.  For all this keeps me away from the one thing that liberates me... the truth.  So long as I tread the path of righteousness and not get stuck with the good that I come across, so long do my chances of meeting the best are alive.  When I'm stuck (whether to evil or goodness), I'm not going to graduate to the Best!  

Untying oneself

As part of the retreat talk, Fr Raj Kumar presented another point for reflection:
Just like a boat still tied to a peg on the shore, we are often held back due to some of our own choices.  In order to row ahead and progress, we need to untie ourselves.  No amount of rowing the boat will take us forward, if the boat is still securely tied to the post on the shore.  No amount of effort to progress in spirituality is of any use, unless we untie ourselves, detach ourselves from some of those things to which we've tied ourselves to.

This Lent, it is good to reflect and see what are those things that I've tied myself down to.  Perhaps good and useful things but really necessary?  Time to move ahead....