Hospital ministry!

 Yesterday I was in the hospital, not for myself but to assist someone.  Not that I made any special effort or anything to assist the person, but I merely behaved and treated the other as if she was perfectly fine.  

Just the usual chat. Normal everyday topics. Nothing to remind her about the ongoing treatment that necessitated her presence in the hospital the whole day.  

I think the best part was to listen to the other. Just plain listening. Not that I was expected to give any grand remedies or responses, but a simple outpouring - non-judgemental and confidential. 

In short, another day of ministry! 

Making others feel at home

 A couple of days ago the readings of the Mass spoke of the only widow who was helped in Israel; then the only leper who was healed on the Jewish soil, and that too him being a Syrian, a non-Jew. The Gospel of the same day speaks of Mary as the chosen one to be the mother of the Messiah. 

What was special about the widow of Zarephath who was helped by Elijah?  What earned her a miraculous supply of food till the next harvest?  Her generosity towards a stranger. In spite of being hungry and well aware that sharing the only morsel of food she had, would result in the early starvation of her son and herself, she chose to offer the last morsel of food to a total stranger. She sacrificed.  She shared.  That too for a stranger. 

What was different about Naaman, the leper, that resulted in him being the only person to be healed by the Jewish prophet? He was open to the advice of everyone. He listened.  He listened to the advice of a slave girl who recommended that she visit the Jewish prophet to get rid of his leprosy.  He listened to his servants when in a rage he wanted to return from the doorstep of the prophet's house.  In spite of him being the army commander, he was open to kind words of others.  

Most importantly, even his servants felt comfortable to share with him their views.  They did not feel frightened or scared of him.  They respected him and hence wished him good.  This would have been  possible only because he was genuinely good to them!  

Listening

 Today's inspiration... 

I guess that is what distinguishes a wise person from a teacher or a learned person... the ability to listen.  Not just hear, but listen with an open mind and a generous heart.  

Of late I've realised my nephew tends to speak longer to me over the phone.  Earlier he barely spoke to me.  But since the time I appreciated and showed some interest in his activities and learning skills he has begun to compete with my niece for 'his time' with me!!  And my niece, not to be outdone, at least for the time spent, goes on and on about stuff I barely can make sense of.  The temptation is to cut her off and end the conversation.  But I know if I do that she is going to interpret it as my disinterestedness in her 'achievements'.  So I listen.  And am happy with that time spent with them, because I know that time is not wasted but invested in a relationship.  Worthy every bit!  

Listening and following

In the readings of the week we see Elijah beginning very solemnly and with great confidence.  Then he loses all of that confidence and trusts and takes flight.  He literally hides himself in a cave out of fear of being murdered!  And when God meets him in the gentle breeze, he tells him to go back to where he came from. To face his torturers rather than flee.  To walk right into the face of death, rather than in the opposite direction.  And Elijah does what he is told.  

Elijah in more than one sense is a very failed prophet.  A very flippety-floppety prophet.  Someone just like us.  Like me.  Courageous and daring at one moment.  Timid and anxious the next.  Emboldened and  very outgoing on one day.  The very next day wake up confused and tired!  But in this very unsteady life pattern, there is one thing Elijah teaches us - me - very clearly:  listening to God!  He is gifted with the grace of discernment and when he hears God speak, he follows!  No more crippling fear. No withholding doubts. No petty vision of mere survival. 

Silence and Listening

The two words silent and listen have the exact same number of alphabet and the same alphabet too.  Just a different order.

Both are so related that one is not possible without the other.  In order to listen, we need to be silent.  And silence comes as a discipline of listening.  One does not exist without the other.  Either both are present together or both are absent.

And the best part is although it is a discipline, it is in letting go that one truly masters this art.  You win by letting go.  The more one forces oneself to achieve it, the more distant they seem.  Weird, but true.

'Being offended'??

There is the incident in Buddha's life that comes to my mind when I hear about the whole debate between 'freedom of speech' and 'no platform'.  One of the basic bones of contention in this debate is offense (giving and taking). 

On an occasion when there were people visiting the Buddha, there was a man who came in and started abusing the Buddha.  But he sat there very calm and quiet.  He never retorted nor got agitated.  After a while, the abuser got tired and left.  The disciples then approached the Buddha and asked him, why didn't he say or do anything when he was being insulted.  The Buddha replied, "When someone offers you a gift and you refuse to take it, whom does it then belong to?"  The disciples replied, "The giver." And the Buddha replied, "He offered me a gift and I did not accept it!  So why get worked up about what is not mine!"

Besides, I know not if there is anything called 'being offended' - no one can offend me, unless I let them offend me.  Furthermore, resorting to anything other than verbal dialogue or debate, in order to show difference of opinion or contest the other person's views, is already conceding defeat! 

Everytime I get angry or hurt, I ask myself why is it that I'm feeling this way.  So rather than merely shut the other person up by shouting or insulting, I merely listen.  I then merely present my side of the story.  And then leave it at that.  If the person merely wants to insult me, by feeling insulted, I'm letting him win, without a valid reason.  And if what he or she says has a point, then it is for me to ponder and respond appropriately (both the other and myself - in the reverse order!). 

The same is true of 'bad words'.  When someone calls out, "Peter" I don't respond.  That's not me. So why should I respond to someone who calls me a 'sob'?  If I do respond, then I'm accepting that title!  

Few words, but long sentences

Remember today a particular Salesian confrere who is known among our circles as a 'man of few words, and long sentences'!  He surely can go on and on about any topic, even the acknowledgement that he does not know anything about the topic!

I remember him once visiting the community where I was, with a very bad sore throat.  That morning, before breakfast he asked me if I could arrange for some hot tea with turmeric for him - just to soothe his aching throat.  And then when I did arrange that, he began to explain to me where, when and how his throat went bad!!  My subtle reminder that giving the mouth a bit of rest would do good to the aching throat was met with another explanation of the scientific reason behind it!! So much for the poor throat.

As I remember him, I recall the words of Fr Lens regarding the length of a sermon during Mass: "5 minutes," he would say!  "After that, the devil speaks!" Genuine listening, without interrupting or talking, is truly an art, a skill, a discipline.  Now that requires patience and leads to wisdom.  But to talk, I guess, even a sore throat would do! 

They heard...

The reading from the Acts of the apostles of this morning, as is always on the feast of the Pentecost, is that of the disciples 'hearing' the others in their own language.  It does not say, that they understood in their own respective language.  It says they heard them speak in their own language.

Other than the primary intended meaning of this being a miracle, the work of the Holy Spirit, how does one explain this?  Why is it that I feel there is something here for me, for my research?

• that there is a 'gap', a wide chasm between 'hearing' and understanding?  Or not?
• that hearing the message being spoken in their own native language did make a huge impact on their attitude and reception of the Gospel, goes without saying.  Primarily because it now 'appealed' to them at a personal level.  The message remained the same, only the channel of communication changed. Not exactly.  Because the channel, medium, language is also the message (McLuhan).
• what of those preaching? Were they aware of themselves speaking in a foreign language? And yet communicate perfectly well, without they themselves really knowing what they were speaking?  That's really doubtful.  The only (human) possibility is that they were totally oblivious of this process.  They could have only been speaking in their native Jewish Hebrew.  It was the listeners who heard it differently from the speakers.  

Listen to God's people

Today is the death anniversary of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, the courageous Christian who bore witness to what it means to be a follower of Christ, through his life, writings and even his death.  It is said that he was sentenced to death on April 8, 1945 and executed the very next day for being part of the group that tried to plot Hitler's assassination.

For my meditation today... a quote of his:

The first service one owes to others in a community involves listening to them,” he wrote. “Just as our love for God begins with listening to God’s Word, the beginning of love for others is learning to listen to them. God’s love for us is shown by the fact that God not only gives God’s Word but also lends us God’s ear. . . . We do God’s work for our brothers and sisters when we learn to listen to them.

Coming from a man who had the opportunity and actually did leave Germany (for New York) in those troubled times of 1939, only to return within a month, asking oneself what merit would it be if he was not with his countrymen in their darkest hour, this quote makes all the difference between life and death!   

Involve children in addressing childrens' issues

After many days and many articles and interventions suggested to encounter the growing knife-crime involving teenagers and youngsters in London, I found one article quite sensible and far-sighted in today's The Times (April 3, 2019).

The author Alice Thomson, in her article 'To beat knife crime, listen to the children', advocates involving the children in addressing the issue rather than excluding them altogether, and treating them as mere recipients of a service!

... we can't just blame the police or teachers or the internet giants; what these children really need... is an alternative to gang life that gives them status.

After listing all the possible solutions offered and debated thus far, she adds specific measures involving directly the children rather than teachers, police and the media.  

... the answer is to provide the young with opportunities rather than deterrents and to include them in finding solutions, rather than leaving it to the politicians to squabble.

We need to give them stable structures and purpose, help them at school with entrepreneurial skills that are useful, give them jobs they can do in their teens and be better role models when they don't have family support. 

Most importantly we need to listen to the vulnerable young rather than seeing them all as just an additional out-of-control, dangerous problem to add to our other woes.  

I'm sure Fr TD John and those involved in PAR, me included, will certainly agree with Alice!  

Bold, open review of existing structures

For quite some time now the British news is all about the NHS and how it is falling apart.  After Brexit, the state of NHS is the most discussed and debated issue in the printed press. 

The National Health Services (NHS) came into effect on July 5, 1948 at the strong recommendation and long battle of the then health minister Aneurin Bevan, a Labour party member.  It was a time after the war and the whole of the world, even Britain, was in recovery mode. Though today none would question the need and the great service NHS offers, back then there were many objections to it - primarily because it imposed tax on everyone and secondly because, doctors saw it as a form of national socialism.  Doctors resented it because it would mean that their independence was now at stake.  They would not be 'small businesses' but state functionaries.  The NHS survived years of revamping, policy changes, even threats of being thrown out...

However, with the reeling pressure of time and circumstances, people do not fear asking the bold questions: Is it time to move on?  Do we still have to invest and sustain a sinking ship?  Alternatives are being discussed and debated.  However, none of them seem to be 'better' than what NHS can. But I like the way the whole point is discussed and debated in open.  There certainly will be some political moves going on in the background, but atleast there is no secrecy about the state of affairs, or rather the sad state of affairs. 

I've admired the way the NHS works.  I may not be aware of all its intricacies but the health care system of the country is worth admiring.  I don't see this possible in India, given its large population and the mind set we presently function with.  Furthermore with the grave economic inequalities that are characteristic of India, a general taxation for health will never really take off.  Moreover, I wonder if we'd ever have such an open and free debate in the public domain, with members of the political parties (no matter whether in power or in opposition) participating and learning, rather than politicizing and merely criticizing each other and conclusively ending up far away from the topic under discussion. 

God's Rosebud!

An interesting anecdote and poem about discernment. 

A new minister was walking with an older, more seasoned minister in the garden one day. Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older preacher for some advice.

The older preacher walked up to a rosebush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing off any petals. The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry. But, because of his great respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to try to unfold the rose, while keeping every petal intact. It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do.

Noticing the younger preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older preacher began to recite the following poem...

It is only a tiny rosebud, 

A flower of God's design; 

But, I cannot unfold the petals 

With these clumsy hands of mine. 

The secret of unfolding flowers 

Is not known to such as I. 

GOD opens this flower so easily, 

But, in my hands they die.

If I cannot unfold a rosebud, 

This flower of God's design, 

Then, how can I have the wisdom 

To unfold this life of mine?

So, I'll trust in God for leading 

Each moment of my day. 

I will look to God for guidance 

In each step along the way.

The path that lies before me, 

Only my Lord and Savior knows. 

I'll trust God to unfold the moments, 

Just as He unfolds the rose.

Vocation Sunday reflection

Each of us has a vocation. Each of us belongs to the Good Shepherd's flock. Each of us has a call! I am a Salesian Brother, but that's not my primary vocation. That's merely how I live out my vocation.

Our primary vocation is to be with Him, and to bear witness to Him; to love God and love life. That's our basic vocation: to love and serve!

And so I constantly ask myself, do I find my life and the way I live it meaningful? Is this the best way that I can be useful to the most number of people? And if my life meets both these criteria, meaningful to myself and useful to others, I know I am living out my vocation well.

And since my vocation is deeply connected with God and others, I need to
constantly listen, be aware, be attentive, be open
be willing to discern, differentiate, interpret, put to test and finally,
be ready to make choices, not just comfortable choices but bold and appropriate choices.

Obedience and rebellion

A couple of days ago in the Gospel reading there was this exclamation made by some who witnessed Jesus calming the sea and the wind, "... who is this?  Even the wind and the seas obey him!"

When I came across this particular statement I was wondering what could the person mean by 'even' the wind and seas?  For all practical purposes there was hardly anyone who 'obeyed' Jesus.  Perhaps the twelve whom he called to be his apostles.  But not sure if there were others whom he called and turned down his invitation.  Just because it is not recorded does not mean that there weren't any.  But for the rest there was hardly anyone who really followed his orders.  The religious and political authorities of his times were in no mood of taking instructions from a carpenter.  All the crowds that came to listen to Jesus heard him speak but follow his directives?  Doubtful.  The one cured of his leprosy, in the reading of yesterday was ordered strictly not to tell anyone of his cure and what did he do? He went about shouting!

In the recently released booklet on the life of Sean Devereux, the opening chapter is the testimony of his mother Maureen Devereux.  In the first para itself she writes

...ever since he was put into my arms, his mind was made up.  If I wanted him to go right, he went left.

There is something in human nature that makes following commands and orders distasteful.  The rebellious streak in the human DNA is something that makes obedience a real challenge.  No wonder it is one of the three vows of religious life - on par with poverty and chastity.  But it is also true that all inventions and discoveries were actually the result of breaking set norms and regulations.  No new knowledge or discovery is possible if everyone faithfully follows trodden path.  Among the religious it is those who refuse to be bound by rules and regulations and authorities that go on to make history.  However there is a fine line between being rebellious and being disobedient. Only those who have trod that fine line go on to positively impact the world; the rest, leave no good behind. 

Children and Discernment

"... in those days, the Lord did not speak often..."  Those are the words in the opening para of today's first reading from the book of Samuel.  Really?  The Lord did not speak?  Perhaps a better way of putting it or understanding it would be to say, 'People were not used to listening' or 'It was not common to hear people say that the Lord spoke to them'.

What makes this episode of the call of Samuel is that the Lord is 'speaking' to a child!  How often would an adult tell a child to be open to listen to God speaking? Worse still, acknowledge the testimony of a child stating that the Lord has appeared or addressed him or her.  We expect and teach the children to listen to us, and no one else.  We ourselves are not atuned or open to anything beyond what we want to listen.

Another related aspect that struck me today is that the whole notion of discernment, which is now the vogue term in Salesian circles (and rightly should be so), is not something that we grow up with.  It is only after we become 'adults' that this process of discernment is introduced into our life and living.  Some may say that children are intellectually incapable of discerning, especially matters beyond the physical.  But if they don't get a taste of what it means to discern and are thereby assisted meaningfully (as in the case of Samuel, by Eli), how will they ever acquire the habit of discernment, especially spiritual discernment?  Perhaps it is we adults who are not really willing to undergo the process of discernment and in turn, prevent children and not trust them enough.  

Accompaniment

Reflection for April 19

The 'Emmaus account' has a typically Salesian flavour. It is basically an excellent summary of genuine accompaniment. To be like the risen Lord who walks along with the disciples. Lovingly and patiently accompanying those entrusted to one's care, listening and responding to them in ways and idioms that they understand. At the same time always challenging them to go deeper. Spiritually it is a pilgrimage of which the centre and focal point is the encounter with the Eucharistic Lord, experienced not merely at the altar but on the dusty path, in the open. It is also an experience that becomes the springboard and launching pad for ministry even when it means hitting the road in the dark of the night, for the light is within.

A personal call

Reflections for April 18

“Rabboni...”

Mary Magdalene recognizes Jesus when He calls her by her name. It is in that face-to-face encounter with Jesus that Mary realises Jesus. And when she relays this incident and Jesus' message to the others they hardly believe her. Besides the fact that all of this was totally new and too much for their grief-stricken moment, it is also indicative of what a 'call' is: a personal invitation, not a common information.

Most often we mortals are so lost in our day-to-day lives that we barely hear His voice or call. Even at times when we are frantically searching for His will, just like Mary desperately pleads with the 'gardener' for Jesus' body, we do not recognize Him. That's because we have an image of Jesus that we are fixated with. Anything different from that would not be considered. Only those who have the patience to sift through human appearances, fixated ideas and pre-meditated results, will be able to hear His call – a call that is personal.

Moreover, Jesus did not entrust some monumental task Mary... just a simple message to be conveyed! That done well, is mission accomplished. To look for a great role, a grand activity is to miss the point of a call.

Our relationship issue

Pre-requisites

Not sure how true or false this attribution to Shakespeare is but all the same, the message is worth a thought.

Before you speak listen.
Before you write, think.
Before you spend, earn.
Before you pray, forgive.
Before you hurt, feel.
Before you hate, love.
Before you quit, try.
Before you die, live. 

Evangelisation

Several times during our community moments of prayer and in the Parish I hear this fervent prayer for 'persecuted Christians' across the globe and places where the proclamation of the Word of God is prohibited.  But looking at the actual situation here in the country makes me also see a sort of similarity in contexts.  In places like Syria and Afghanistan, Christians are persecuted and there is barely anyone to really stand by them.  It is more a struggle for survival and yet people retain their faith.  Here in the UK, the ambiance is perfectly peaceful; there are several churches; rather sufficient clergymen (though not as before) and the whole system is indeed very Christian... but most people don't want to listen!  They are happy living their lives totally disconnected from the Church or the faith.  I do not say that they are living immoral lives, certainly no, but the Church has no say in their living.

A weird situation: in one place they cannot speak and even if someone dares to, he or she is silenced; in another they can but no one is willing to listen!  No wonder, it is said that evangelization is primarily the work of the Spirit!