Generosity

This story is told that one day a beggar by the roadside asked for alms from Alexander the Great, as he passed by. The man was poor and wretched and had no claim upon the ruler no right even to lift a solicitous hand. Yet the Emperor threw him several gold coins. 

A courtier was astonished at his generosity and commented: “Sir, copper coins would adequately meet a beggar’s need. Why give him gold?” 

Alexander responded in royal fashion: “Copper coins would suit the beggar’s need but gold coins suit Alexander’s giving.” 

Generosity is not just about fulfilling needs it is a reflection of our character and our inner goodness!

Giant of gentleness

To tell you the truth, I was afraid of losing in a quarter of an hour this little bit of liquid of gentleness… … which I have attempted to gather for twenty-two years, drop by drop like dew in the vessel of my puny heart!

[St Francis de Sales]

Meaning of success

 Some interesting quotes from Charlie Mackesy, The Boy, the mole, the fox and the Horse.

"What do you want to be when you grow up?"

"Kind," said the boy.

 

"What do you think success is?" asked the boy. 

"To love," said the mole. 

 

"What do you think is the biggest waste of time?"

"Comparing yourself to others," said the mole. 

 

"One of the greatest freedoms is how we react to things"

 

"Often the hardest person to forgive is yourself."

Growing up

Came across a new children's book gathering attention.  It is by Charlie Mackesy who actually began to put up he sketches on instagram.  Liked the following picture... and the message:

Photo taken of The Times (Oct. 17, 2019).  Inset photo of Charlie Mackesy

Wonder

Last night I watched the movie Wonder.  A simple but well narrated story of a boy Auggie Pullman with facial deformities joining the school and facing all odds that come with his facial deformity.  What I liked beside the mainline story is how the movie narrates in parallel the lives of other children around him. There is his own sister who feels left out because all the attention and care is directed towards her brother. She knows too well that this focus of attention on her brother is not malicious or against her, but she also realizes that her own need for warmth and affection is at stake.  Then there is her best friend struggling with similar issues.  There are the bunch of friends of Auggie back in school, each of them has his or her own story running in the background. In all these instances what comes out is the presence of one or some individuals who assure the person struggling that he or she is not alone.  That mere presence and assurance makes the whole difference between making and breaking a life.

The influence of parents is vividly seen in the life of children.  Contrast the attitude of the mother of Jack Hill with that of the parents of Julian... worlds apart.  Children usually grow up to be what their parents in fact are.  The constant love and support that Auggie receives from his own parents is truly noteworthy.

I liked in particular one of the opening quotes of the movie:

Another quote that struck me is the one uttered by the Principal of the school, when interacting with the parents of school bully;

Auggie cannot change the way he looks. But we can change the way we see!

It's a good movie to watch, but both children and caregivers (in our Salesian context) ought to watch it together.

Kindness

What goes around, comes around! 

Manners and morals

Initially I thought that manners are offshoots of morals.  That manners and etiquette are byproducts of morals.  Therefore they serve the same purpose as morals, albeit on a less grievous or serious tone. Both are needed for the smooth running of society.

However, I'm beginning to doubt if that's true.  That manners and morals are related, is true. But does being well-mannered mean one is morally sound too - or the vice-versa.  If one has his morals right, would he or she be well-mannered automatically?  I don't think so. 

One could be well behaved and polite and courteous in society, but in reality be an immoral person. Take for instance, the politician (one can practically include every politician, anywhere in the world). On the other hand, take a tribal or one belonging to the indigenous population. Or even a simple person from a rural setting.  Most often they have their morality or ethical practices very sound.  They are not really corrupted by the malicious mind of civilization and technology.  However, his 'manners' may appear crude or unpolished.  

From another viewpoint, would it be right to call someone who goes about swearing (not at anyone in particular, though) and behaving in an uncouth manner, immoral?  Or would it be right to say that his moral compass is skewed?  Manners are contextual while morals are universal (or are they?).  Manners change as per place, time, persons, occasions.  Morals don't (at least not as fluidly as manners).  

While both manners and morals are rooted in society, culture, tradition, and history, they may not always be on the same side.  

Novena to Don Bosco: Discipline and Perseverance

Novena to Don Bosco

(Remembering DON BOSCO and the significant people who shaped his life and works)

Day 2: Francis de Sales 

(Patron of the Salesian Society) 

DISCIPLINE AND PERSEVERANCE

Don Bosco choose St Francis de Sales as the patron of his Salesian Congregation because he was inspired by the loving kindness of this great saint. The life of St Francis de Sales showed him that change is not only possible; that it is as vital as breathing.

Begin to practice self-denial in little things, so that later you will be able to do so in bigger things. 

In a goodnight to the boys of his oratory exhorting them to grow in the virtue of mortification and perfection in little things of life. 

Forgive others everything; yourself, nothing. 

Following the example of St Francis de Sales, Don Bosco learnt to be charitable to others, but never to oneself. He practised great tolerance towards his boys and others but was very austere with himself. 

Pray, pray, but with faith – with living faith! Courage! Onward, ever onward! 

One of the last words of Don Bosco on his deathbed in the month of January 1888. 
(Click here to download the pdf file for display)

Transparency

Yesterday was the second death anniversary of Fr John Lens. I know not if his autobiography is being considered for publication or not.  Most probably with all the excitement of the visit of the Rector Major to the Province, this would have got shelved for another year.

Anyway, as I thanked God for this person, especially his role in my life, I could not think of a better description of him than this short verse from Thomas A Kempis, as quoted in Waymarks:

The purer the eye of the intention is, the more strength the soul finds within itself... but it is very rare to find a soul entirely free, whose purity is not at all sullied by some stain of a secret searching for itself... Work, therefore, to purify the eye of your intention in order that it might be single and upright.

Somehow Fr Lens, even in his weakness and shortcomings, made Salesian sanctity more appealing. He was not a perfect man.  He too knew that all too well and didn't in any way try to hide or camouflage it.  Neither did he take pride in his shortcomings.  But he did possess a great inner strength. He derived it from his transparent effort at being kind and loving. More than the love, it is this constant and transparent effort at being lovable, that I recall with great joy.

Big vs the Small

In contrast to my recent visit to Osmania hospital, today I had the opportunity to enter in Care Hospital at Nampally.  Of course, being a posh hospital of the corporate structure, the system in place was well organised, neat and smooth.  So was the price!

As I was waiting for the doctor to meet and speak about the patient whom I was there for, I was watching the many people coming in, going out, working and some walking around.  Except among the staff, all the rest of those there were strangers to one another.  However, there was the look of agony on all their faces - I'm not talking of the patients.  One might say, what else do you expect at a hospital. Well, the expression was not just of physical pain or anguish, but a weird sense of being alone in a large lonely world, a look of being lost in thought of know not what.  But a gentle smile, a kind helping hand, even if it was just to help push a stretcher or lift a garbage bin, the whole face brightens up.

We often think and pursue large and lofty goals and dreams, in the hope that we'd be happy if we get what we are after. We forget that more than those big and lofty goals it is simple acts of kindness and help that bring greater and effective cheer in our lives.  It is these small tender and unexpected deeds that grease the larger machinery of life, that keep life going.