Once given is given totally

This morning I passed on to Fr Stephen some books (ordo, diary and a books of reflections). He was delighted to have them. I frankly told him that I had these books but was not using them and hence I passed them on to him. In fact, all of those were gifted to me by someone or the other. And those who gave me those knew very well that they wouldn't last long with me - that I'd pass them on to others! For me what is given is given. When I give something to someone, I just forget about it. What they do with it is totally and completely their choice. I am least bothered about what they do with it. However, I was not so. I always thought that people should respect gifts and use them for themselves. I had a rude shock which changed this belief and attitude of mine when during my initial years of Practical Training, that too in the beginning of the year itself, I printed out name labels of the Confreres, cut them neatly and then handed them over to each of them personally. All of them, juniors and seniors, received them with joy and thanked me, except for one. He just took them and tore them even before they left my hand! And them solemnly put those torn bits back in my hand.

I was very badly hurt ... but that day I learnt the lesson for which I am happy now. You never give unless you are really willing to give away. Once given is given. It is no more yours. It is the right and the privilege of the other to do with it what he or she best wishes to!