Insights from the seminar on Sexuality-2

Fr Joe during the seminar on sexuality and celibacy stated more than once that a truly inspired and inspiring religious or Priest will have three or four encounters with a person of the opposite sex where in he or she will feel that it would be great to settled down in life with that person.  He also was quick to add, that this is normal; it is healthy and there is nothing sinful about it. However, what makes this delicate balance of relationship murky is clarity of who and what we are and what we intend to do or be.  Blessed is he who is able to develop a healthy relationship with a person of the opposite sex for he/she that would certainly ensure a greater living out of one's religious vocation.

Someone during the break asked me, "How is it possible to jump in the well and not get wet?" He continued, "Fr Joe is asking us not to shriek from relationships with women but how does one still stay 'clean'?"  I shared with him what I truly felt about this:  Relationships are relationships, but what makes or breaks them is the attitude one has when one's dealing with the other.  Furthermore, if one is open and sincere, seeking the good of the other and knowing well what is good for oneself, both those involved in the relationship will benefit out of it.

My points for further clarity were thus laid out for him:

• Do I hesitate to share my friendship (friend) with those of my community confreres? 
• Does the relationship enhance the quality of my ministry and the ministry/life of the other?  (A true and genuine relationship will automatically do great wonders for one's mission).
• Do I have the liberty and space to express my sincere feelings and emotions to the other without fear of being misunderstood or manipulated?  
• Does the relationship widen my horizon to include more and more people or does it close the world in only on just the two of us?  (The former is a great indicator of a healthy relationship; the latter is a sign of immaturity in friendship).