Today, for the first time, I distributed salaries to the staff of the house. I got this idea of inserting a small 'thank you' note into each of the envelopes containing the salary and felt it was good that I did so. However, handing the envelopes was an experience in itself!! I could clearly see emotions and feelings so confused, written all over their faces. There was joy at receiving the money, the sadness of the loan-amount being cut, the anxiety of managing with the cash in hand, the hope of doing something (perhaps purchasing something), the doubt of miscalculation by me.... Gosh! It was all there - none could have missed it! Then there were some who just wouldn't stop perspiring and fretting when the loan repaid did not tally with their account. Only when it was clarified and cleared did a breath escape their nostrils! There was another who practically emptied his envelope within 10 seconds of receiving it: clearing debts in house!
I had the joy of handing over their salaries - implying I had so much of cash in hand. For me the currency in my hand was mere paper. But for them, it was life! It was their sweat and blood - every bit of it precious and life-giving. I know I don't spend money lavishly - some even call me stingy! Yet my monthly expenditure - if I were to calculate ALL my expenses - would be more than the monthly income of some of them. To top it all, it is I who have taken the vow of poverty - and they, have no choice but to live it! I wonder if I'd be able to manage a whole family with what they receive as their monthly salary?
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