Am grateful!

 Standing at this juncture and looking back at the year that has been, am asking myself what am I most grateful for, right now at this very moment??  

I truly am grateful for this opportunity to continue my PhD research.  On the academic front, truly this year has been a year of long silent gaps, change of questions and directions, more lows than any highs, and so to have scraped through the annual review with the chance to continue and finish this doctorate, appears a real blessing.  And for this am more than grateful to all the people who've supported and encouraged me to persist: confreres here in the community, back in the province, family members, friends from all over who have truly made me feel worthwhile and capable - especially in moments when I felt low and desperate. For the deep affection and fervent prayers of so many wonderful people, I truly am grateful!!  

Jesus the migrant

One thought that has recurred in my mind this advent is the fact that the one whose birthday we celebrate, the feast which practically means so much for most of the western world, Christmas which means so much to so many in so many different ways is actually the celebration of a migrant birth!!  

That Jesus was born outside his own home, his own parent's house, that too in a stable, a lowly place considered fit only for domestic animals, is so often repeated in our sermons and reflections, but we can sum it all into one word: being a migrant, a refugee, a stranger in a lowly and lonely place.  Amazingly we celebrate this birth with such great festivities, yet choose not to be disturbed by the way we treat the stranger and the lonely, the 'other'.  

Not just the child Jesus, but practically every other Biblical character was a refugee, a migrant at some crucial point of his or her life, if not the entire life itself: Abraham was on the move, after he thought he had set his roots,  Moses had to flee from his brother, Joseph was sold into slavery and imprisoned in Egypt... why, even Adam was evicted from his first home, by none other than God himself!! 

While there are numerous generous and noble people today (as in times before) who open their hands and hearts to the migrants and refugees, it is alarming to see the modern world speckled with countless refugee camps and agonising immigration processes that dehumanise persons - most often, in the name of securing the dignity of other human beings.  

So I ask myself, how justified am I everytime I claim something as 'mine'... my land, my home, my property, my inheritance, my rights... what is the cost of making something 'mine'?  Can there be a 'mine' wherein the other is not denied 'his'?  How do I happily make the journey from 'mine' to 'ours'? 

What's my real need?

 The first reading of the day offers us a glimpse of why and on what basis was Jesus' coming as messiah read - or misinterpreted - by the people of His time. That he was looked upon as a saviour, a political liberator of the Jews from the rule of the Romans should not come as a surprise given the history of what the Jews have all along been fed.  

The reading from the book of Judges tells of the circumstances in which Samson is born and what the angel tells his mother prior to his conception and birth... 

"As for the son you will conceive and bear, no razor shall touch his head, for this boy is to be consecrated to God from the womb. It is he who will begin the deliverance of Israel from the power of the Philistines."

Moreover I do understand the angst of the Jews, especially those who felt burdened by the yoke of the Romans - and perhaps their own religious elders.  One would naturally want to be delivered and saved from such an existential risk and danger, than seek spiritual emancipation. Given this situation, spiritual emancipation appears more of a luxury in comparison to the basic question of survival posed by other existential circumstances.  To a person on the brink of starvation, if one were to offer a choice between food and the Eucharist, what would the person choose?  I certainly would choose food.  That the Eucharist is also food, and all that theology comes only later.  Not at that moment of extreme hunger and need.  

Root of Jesse

 Jesus' actual life story and place in history is far from the analogical 'root of Jesse'.  Hearing the genealogy of Jesus and the whole way Jesus is related to David and right upto Abraham, he is more like the shoot that springs up from a rather battered sapling or tree that has been itself transplanted several times.  The more apt analogy would be of a shoot that rises from a fallen stump... not just a solid tree, but one that has been battered and cut and left for dead.  From that neglected stump, a new life springs up and grows into a flourishing tree.  

All of this takes nothing away from the Scriptural imagery and importance we hear during the advent season, especially during the days of the Christmas novena.  

Identifying the Lord

 Most people who enter an active field of work, after a prolonged period of theoretical study and even stimulated practice will vouch for the fact that the actual task itself is nothing compared to what they've been preparing themselves for all along.  No soldier would say that actual war and killing is the same as all the drill and practice they've had before hand.  No matter how many years a medical student practices his or her medicine, the first surgery is always different.  One may participate in a holy Mass all ones life, yet celebrating the first Mass as a priest is a totally different experience altogether. Nothing ever prepares one for reality.  Meeting reality in its crude and actual form is much more than all that one undergoes in order to prepare one when one encounters it.  

John the Baptist was born in order to prepare for the Lord.  He himself knew this all too well and did a great job.  Yet when the Lord himself appeared on the scene, John was not sure if He was the Messiah.  So he sends out his disciples to ask Jesus directly if he is the messiah.  After all those years of being and doing what he was doing, even John the Baptist was not 100% sure when he met Jesus.  The same as any army personnel or a surgeon or a newly ordained priest.  There is something more than the sum of all preparation that eludes one when one encounters the actual reality.  That first or actual encounter is lesson in its own right.  

So I ask myself, if John the Baptist whose mission was to prepare the way, did not instantly recognise the messiah, what chance do I have of recognising or identifying - leave alone worshipping - Him?  One way it is to be always ready, and treat everyone as the messiah.  A perpetual advent!  Another way would be to ask the Lord himself!!  

Writing

Academic writing, I've come to accept (and give in to), is painful!!  It is so devoid of feelings and passion, that it feels nothing!!  Yet is a mental torture - for the one writing (at least for me) and for the one reading!  

I've realised that's the only way forward. I don't see any other way out of completing my studies.  So far, I wrote what gripped me, what I truly felt was significant.  It was much much more than mere words for a dissertation.  It had to have a personal relevance to me, if it had to find a place in my text.  But I guess, that does not count for much.  To be academically accepted and approved, it ought to be complicated, incomprehensible to anyone outside the academia, and most importantly I've got to stop getting personally involved, in the sense of seeking meaning, something special for myself!  Just the head and not the heart! 

And what am I writing about?? Language and meaning!! 

Formation blues

 There is a lovely scene in the movie 'Hidden figures' when the chief of the space project tells his main supervisor who constantly brushes aside the only black female 'super computer' who calculates the mathematical side of the space project to the moon, that his main job is to look for talent and nurture it, not curb it. 

Having spent more than a decade in formation settings, as a formator, I ask myself, how much of a talent have I recognised in those I've lived with, especially the students - leave alone encouraged and nurtured it?  

Perhaps most of us formators are looking for ways and means of 'moulding' the students into a particular cast.  So we'd be more keen about trimming their eccentricities and creativities, rather than see how those can further the Salesian mission. The former method is easier to carry out and well formulated in our guidebooks, in comparison to the latter! The latter requires an interpretation of the guidelines... multiply the interpretations with the number of students we engage with!!  But that's formation.  That's the task of a formator.  The regularity and constancy to this process is brought in by his/her person, not the bending of everyone else to one's monolithic interpretation. 

Creativity

 How does one define or explain 'creativity'? In simple words it is 'divergent thinking' that results in effective and surprising consequences - not all of which can be good or beneficial.  While it is good to learn and know that 2 + 2 = 4.  Now that's a single, linear, unchallengeable, correct answer.  But to the question 'What equals 4?' there could be numerous answers, and all of them correct.   

While effectiveness and novelty, are the resulting offshoots of creativity, certain factors contribute towards the origin of creative ideas or works: 

• an openness of mind towards alternatives, but for a specific purpose (or else any thinking could be branded creative!)
• willingness to take risks (greater the risk to personal aspects rather than others, the better it steers the creative act away from being a negative or malevolent one - at least, it is not negatively intended)
• availability of time (but for some, the opposite could be true!)

Smacking laugh

 The last couple of months have been tough - for various reasons and on various fronts!  Am getting myself to blog, not because circumstances have changed, but strongly feel that it is I that needs to change and adapt rather than wait for 'favourable circumstances'.  Hence want to start writing even if it is just a line or two - and what better day than on Fr Joshtrom's b'day and the beginning of Advent!  

For now something light... 

Came across the following photo while reading a news articles a couple of weeks ago which spoke of Scotland making smacking of children illegal.  While the article itself was not of great importance for me but what caught my eye was the photograph!  Know not if the editors purposely put in that photo (at least the text didn't give any such indication!) or was that quizzical look on the toddler's face, as if reading the placard, just coincidental.  Anyway, have had it on my desktop, just to cheer me up! 

To get a better contextual idea (and enjoy the original), here's the news article: Scotland makes smacking illegal  

The dilemma

 The dilemma... (just rambling!!)

There is no point answering or offering the justification to Taylor, because he is not looking for one or needs one.  Even if I did offer him a justification, it would not bother or enhance his approach in anyway.  

On the other hand, if there is someone else - other than Taylor - that I need to offer the justification to, then the problem is that I do not have a 'formal justification'.  I really do not and cannot state that there is a norm that now needs to be followed or based on which the theory holds good.  Because if I do so, I'd be undermining the basic Constitutive theory which I intend to uphold.  I therefore need to justify the factors that need to be recognised and permitted to have a role, without themselves becoming norms or bound by norms.  

Who then would be such a person, who could use Taylor's theory - albeit with some drawbacks that need to be addressed?  The closest I found is Willard Quine... 

Rorty!!

Don't chase the butterfly

 Inspirational thought for the day... 

Happy b'day Mother Mary

 Received a photo from home with the following b'day drawing with another colourful handwritten note.  It was meant for Mother Mary on her b'day.  Mum told my niece Anet, the artist and author to send it to me so that I could convey the wishes which were written in English to Mother Mary.  By the time I called back home in the evening, Anet was convinced that Mother Mary did not have a language barrier!!  She knew all languages, nonetheless I managed to convince her to prepare her next greeting in Konkani.  What convinced her was my argument that everyone writes and talks to Mother Mary in English, very few in Konkani.  

All of this just to get her to learn some Konkani - our mother tongue. As it is, my brother's and my konkani is bad. Anet's is hilarious! 

Of names and changes

 Years ago when the Salesians were running a school in Cowley, Oxford the staff comprised mostly of Salesians.  There were only three lay people from outside employed as teachers!! 

During one year there was a young brother named Rudolf who was sent there for his practical training. The Rector did not want him to be the butt end of all jokes (as the red nosed reindeer) changed his name to Peter.  So he was called Br Peter.  The following year Br Peter Quinn arrived in Cowley.  In order to avoid clash of names and identities, Peter Quinn was renamed as Joseph Quinn.  The following year another Brother named Joseph arrived!!!  This went on for 7 years.  And each year the incoming Brother had to change his name - all because there already was one confrere by that name (which most often wasn't his original name at all)!

Baby shower

Re-watched the hindi movie Hum aapke hain koun... the first time I watched it was with a classmate of mine, Rajeev.  We went to a theatre in Secunderabad.  That was the first time we, my brother and I, watched a movie in a theatre, with anyone other than our parents. I still remember Willy and I went to Rajeev's house and when we arrived there, he was still sleeping.  His sister who answered the door was quite surprised to see us and her spontaneous statement was "They are so small!" Indeed compared to Rajeev, we were pygmies!!  

Anyhow, what caught my attention in the movie as I sat through it was the grant celebrations of the wedding and baby shower.  Then there is the tradition of the baby shower being attended by only the ladies!  When I was in the provincial house, Sheeba, was one of the consistent members of the DB Digits office. When she was carrying Grace, her first child, in all her ignorance, she invited me for her own baby shower ceremony.  Later I asked Rani (the Economer's secretary) as to when the house staff plan to go, so that I can join them and she replied with a hearty laugh, "Brother, it's meant only for ladies!!" 

It all came back to me when I came across this particular amusing cartoon of the nativity scene... no wonder why men are not allowed! 

Papal trivia

Gregory the great, whose feast we commemorate today, was the first monk to be elected Pope! And I think it would not be too far off the mark to say that it was Gregory who actually cemented the role of the Pope as a ruler, an administrator in the early years of Christianity.  Not that he intended it to be - certainly his priority was the spiritual growth and consolidation of the Church.  That is evident from his numerous letters and writings.  But his ability to foresee events and plan as per was something that went hand in hand with this catechetical skill. 

Moreover it is to him that it can be attributed the narrowing down of the election to the papacy (and roles of ecclesial hierarchy) from among the priestly and religious - again, no fault or plan of his!! 

Things are not to be loved for the sake of a place, but places are to be loved for the sake of their good things. 

When Augustine asked whether to use Roman or Gallican customs in the mass in England, Gregory said, in paraphrase, that it was not the place that imparted goodness but good things that graced the place, and it was more important to be pleasing to the Almighty.

Imitate their faith?

 The latter half of the New Testament and especially the epistles often contain this exhortation: Imitate their faith, citing the example of some of the renown Christians of the times. 

However, this exhortation has led to some confusion.  Not the exhortation itself but the way we have interpreted it - or failed to understand it.  When Paul exhorts the Corinthians to imitate the lives of the faith of the apostles, he and the people whom he is speaking to are both alive and present.  But faith is not something that is evident in and by itself!  How does one 'see' faith?  It is only words and action that one sees.  In such a scenario it is easy to 'imitate' the action rather than the unseen source that propels it.  For a first-time believer or a person interested, the curiosity is aroused primarily by what he or she sees the other say and do.  It is only much later that the person may (or may not) come to see that what actually moves the doer to say and do what is said and done!  And what if the doer himself or herself is still struggling very much with one's own grasp of faith?  Nonetheless, what one sees is the action, not faith itself. 

On the other hand, how else is faith made manifest?  There is no other alternative method either.  It is purely by one's way of life that the other sees the depth of that person's faith.  

How does one bridge this gap? How does one make the journey from action to belief? Something pragmatic to the metaphysical?  One way of looking at it purely from the human perspective, is to see this whole process as a merely human endeavour.  In such a case, it is easy to forget the role of the Spirit! On the other hand, even when we acknowledge the role of the Spirit, it does not explain everything.  Why is it that so many witness the good works but not all are led to the faith?  If the Spirit was impartial then all would be 'faithful'.  Herein comes the role of the individual.  So it is not all the working of the Spirit - alone.  

Whichever way we interpret and understand the process, as humans there is always the danger of imitating actions, rather than imbibing the faith!  If we truly imbibe the faith, actions - good ones at that - will naturally follow.  It is more like a vicious circle: faith is seen through good actions; but good actions alone do not end in faith; and even when one does have faith, one does not have any other means than good actions to bear witness to that faith.  

Sanctity and humour

 I'm not an artist or one to really comment on art, but could not help but notice the fact that most of the historical paintings of eminent artists, especially of the Biblical figures, are all very serious and tense.  One hardly comes across Biblical characters in a lighter mood or appearing really happy.  There is always a sort of tension prevailing within that gets reflected on the face. 

It is hard to imagine that all those Biblical characters or the saints of the past did not know how to smile or be happy.  Could not have been so - after all, they were all human and in most cases, convinced and passionate about their commitment. Of course, all of them did have to face a lot of trials and tribulations, but even those they gladly embraced.  Those difficulties did not count much in the face of their primary choice for God and His people.  So why the long, sad, brooding face?? 

I'm guessing such paintings were in a way reflecting the inner tension of the artist himself or herself.  Especially of paintings which portray great depth and personality, the artist must have really drained him/herself out to be filled in with the person he or she is painting.  That's a heavy toll on oneself.  So evidently that pours out through the brush and the expression.  But I suppose, in reality, these Biblical characters and Saints whose numerous paintings we come across were men and women of good cheer and humour.  Difficult to imagine otherwise!

Re-focussing

With the new academic year commencing today for the schools I feel a sense of relief that I'm not part of it.  Earlier in the year when I first heard that my services as a part time RE teacher would not be required, I felt bad.  But over time, I've realised the amount of time and energy it needed really drained me out and I couldn't afford it at this point of my research and study.  

Today as I see the hustle and bustle of life around the beginning of school and classes, am glad that I don't have to be 'anxious' any more of the same.  Challenging and satisfying as it was, I feel better off without that additional excitement, in order to focus on my own study.  

Come September

 

Artists: Bobby Darin and supported by Billy Vaughn Ochestra (1961)

Entering the last triad of the calendar year and the first term of the academic year - at least for those involved in active school apostolate! But for ordinary mortals like me, it's another month, but one beginning on a good note.  Feel optimistic and charged!  The last couple of months have been great for me - though of course, it has been catastrophic for most.  Never been more busy and well-organised... feel good about it all.  Wish to continue on that momentum this September too! 

Choice

The liturgical commemoration of today and tomorrow are very much related.  Today we have John the Baptist who loses his head (literally) for standing up to what he believes to be true and right.  Tomorrow we have Jeremiah complaining to Yahweh that he cannot resist him!! Try as he may, he cannot but speak His word and be a prophet.  

One thing common in both John the Baptist and Jeremiah, is that they end up paying a heavy price for their adherence to what they believe as true.  Like Jeremiah, there could have been moments in the life of John too when he could have just walked away.  Given up all that he felt deep within, and taken the easy path - the path chosen by most people, anyway!  None would have noticed. None would have accused him of 'being normal'. Yet, neither of them gives in to that temptation, that desire, that feeling.  They continue living a life, not really chosen by them but they find themselves embracing it none the same! 

Rationally this is difficult to explain.  They did not choose to be the 'odd ones out' in the first place.  But by carrying on, are they really consenting to that life-style?  Surely there is more than the mind here at play.  Difficult to get the mind around it.  The heart finds its way! 

Validity

On Validity, as conceived in social sciences... (extracts from here, an article by Eric Schwitzgebel)

Shadish, Cook, and Campbell (2002) begin with a seemingly clear commitment: validity is a property of inferences. 

Validity is a property of inferences. It is not a property of designs or methods, for the same design may contribute to more or less valid inferences under different circumstances.... So it is wrong to say that a randomized experiment is internally valid or has internal validity -- although we may occasionally speak that way for convenience (p. 34)

Inferences are not true or false. They are valid or invalid. What is true or false are propositions: the premises and the conclusion.

An inference is one thing and a claim is another! Shadish et al., despite emphasizing that validity is a property of inferences, confusingly add they will treat "inference" and "knowledge claim" interchangeably. But an inference is not a knowledge claim. An inference is a process of moving from the hypothesized truth of one or more claims to a conclusion which, if all goes well, is true if the claims are true.

Psychologists' and social scientists' claims about validity, in my judgment, make the most sense on the whole and are simplest to interpret if we treat validity as fundamentally a property of claims or propositions rather than as a property of inferences (or methods or instruments or experiments).

Validity, in the psychologists' and social scientists' sense, is best conceptualized as a property that belongs to claims: the property those claims have when they are true.

I diagnose the confusion as arising from three sources: First, ... Second, a tendency among those who do want to rigorize to notice that the philosophers' logical notion of validity applies to arguments or inferences, and consequently some corresponding pressure to think of it that way in the social sciences too, despite the dominant grain of social science usage running a different direction.

Consistent constancy

Every time we think or speak of St Monica, it is always in conjunction with St Augustine, her son.  The connection is obvious and therefor easy to make.  Nonetheless, one ought to be able to appreciate her commitment and consistency, rather than what she achieved.  

For someone to be so consistent and committed, one has to either be in love or utterly desperate.  Monica's consistent attachment to her son (and her husband too) is something that we need to celebrate.  She could have very well given up on him - after all, he was no small child or teenager.  But when has a mother ever given up on her children? 

In Monica's loving dedication and optimistic constancy one gets an opportunity to appreciate the same virtues we see in our own mothers. Perhaps we don't always appreciate it, but none can deny (or escape) it! 

Hard days (and) night(s)

 Nothing better describes my present state than the opening lines of this song of The Beatles... 

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog...

Having spent the last couple of days getting one of my PhD chapters ready for submission to the university review panel has been really taxing.  Not so much the amount of work, but the lack of continued application.  In short, have been quite lazy and laid back.  So had to make up in a hurry! 

Unchristian catholic

Sometimes one wonders how come some have such a range of convictions, one contradicting another so fully and clearly, yet comfortable with them all and proudly claiming to be loyalists to one side. 

Simple example (from a recent news article, with no prejudice against the person): 

...has positioned herself as a strong supporter of Mr Trump and is pro-gun, pro-border wall and anti-abortion.

This is the profile of an American politician holding opposite ends of the ethical spectrum and still claiming to be a Christian.  So on the one hand she is against abortion - that's a typical christian stand.  At the same time she upholds the border wall, something that divides and dehumanizes another human being (not to mention oneself)!  And as if that is not enough encourages the gun culture.  How can one who upholds life at one stage or form (that of babies) be against the same life at another point in age (youngsters or adults)?  And to top it all, there's 'Mr Trump' in the same sentence! 

This sort of comfortable cognitive dissonance is not something entirely new or shocking.  I've come across people of this kind, and they just don't see the polarity!! Just not!! But what is shocking is that there are more and more such people becoming leaders and policy makers! Now that's something catastrophic. 

My faith as a Catholic is just as plain and direct as being a good human.  If I can't be a good human, then I can never claim to be a Catholic either - and the vice-versa too! 

Human palms and language

 Learning of the day... human palms are of lighter colour than our skin. Even though this is most evident with those of us who are dark skinned but even those with lighter complexion, this becomes evident when one undergoes a tan.  The colour of our palms somehow still remain lighter than the rest of the body.  No other animal has this feature.  

The first to notice this and use this biological factor as an evidence for his theory was an anthropologist named Gordon Hewes.  He used this fact as an evidence to support his 'gestures first' theory in the field of origin of language.  That human beings used gestures to communicate far before and more effectively than using verbal words and sounds, is the backbone of this theory.  He speculated that this human peculiarity evolved to increase the visibility of our gestures. However, this is not the strongest of his arguments to prove his theory, nonetheless is an interesting and often overlooked human phenomenon. 

I was wondering how does this apply to the soles of our feet?  After all, they too are lighter in colour when compared to the skin around... unless you are like some of us who prefer to go around barefoot, in which case the soles of our feet are darker than coal!!  So actually speaking Hewes would have to explain the depigmentation on our soles if he was citing the lighter colour on our palms as an evolutionary change to facilitate gestures.  

A cheerful giver

 The saint whose name we heard most while at home as kids, was that of St Lawrence.  That's because both Mum and Dad hailed from Karkala, the place of the famous shrine of St Lawrence.  Besides, Papa was a great devotee of him.  

We grew up hearing different stories and hymns of St Lawrence.  So much so, my younger brother's middle name is Lawrence.  

It is said that St Lawrence when he realised that he would be the next to be taken into custody and face persecution, decided to give away the wealth of the Church to the people!  As a deacon he was the treasurer of the property and rather than let it be added to the wealth of the emperor, he decided to give it all to the poor and needy of the place!  

And then there is the famous line he uttered while being grilled! "This side is done, now turn me over!" Humour and charity.  Those were the two great virtues of St Lawrence.  Both of which were fed by a genuine love of Christ.  

Philomena

I watched the movie Philomena, with Fr Peter this evening.  I had seen it earlier and found it very insightful and deep.  Knew Fr Peter would love it - I was right.  

In this viewing, as in the previous viewing, I again found myself on the side of the journalist - raging, unforgiving and deeply upset.  To really fathom the 'forgiveness' of Philomena and her attitude to what she underwent in the prime of her life, is something very very difficult.  To reach that state of equanimity where you see the past as something you wish didn't happen, but not exactly for the same reasons which you were then told.  

However, this time I understood to some extent the logic of the stubbornness of the former superior of the convent who hid the fact from both, Philomena and her son as well.  Her strong conviction that what she did and the way she did it was the right and the best thing to have done, and that God certainly would approve of it stems perhaps from a deep fear of having to face a past.  If she were to change her opinion and see that what she then did was not something good, would be to negate a whole lifetime - that too while having done and lived it with great fervour and dedication.  That fear of rendering one's whole life's effort - genuine and dedicated - as totally absurd and disgraceful would be too horrible a thing to do to oneself.  Especially at that age and stage of life where one could do nothing more!  When all you have is memories.  But Philomena actually shows that even at that advanced age and time, when unable to do anything more, she could still forgive!  The Sister, on the other hand, couldn't forgive herself!  

Martha's action

Most often while interpreting the episode of Jesus supporting the role of Mary during his visit to his friends' house in Bethany, over and above that of Martha, we try to see and show how both action and contemplation are needed.  From a practical point of view too both are essential.  

Imagine a house where there was only Mary.  Jesus certainly did not go alone to their house.  It was mostly along with his apostles, I guess. What if there was no Martha at home?  Only Mary who preferred to sit by Jesus' side and listen to him.  The apostles and even Jesus would long for someone to offer them some water to drink and a bit to taste!  The word of God satisfies the soul, but it does not satiate actual hunger or thirst.  

The difficulty comes when one has to judge or grade one over the other: action or contemplation?  Martha does that.  She strongly feels that her action is better than that of Mary's contemplation.  She seeks Jesus' opinion to endorse her view - and gets shot down!  The key is to relish what one does best, rather than compare and contrast it with someone else's choice.  

Parasite

Watched the movie Parasite the other day in with another confrere.  Cannot really say that I enjoyed it - not my favourite genre.  Not really.  But what I did like about the movie was the cinematography and direction.  There were no lose ends to any of the sub-plots in the movie.  All instances were well tied up and well connected too to the main plot.  Very well thought out and beautifully shot.  

The fact that one had to follow the english subtitles and at the same time keep an eye on the whole frame being screened was difficult.  But I guess one cannot help it if the movie is in another language.  Nonetheless I should say that there was great care to translate the movie well.  

One moral of the movie that came across strongly to me was the great risk of greed amidst poverty.  That poverty itself is no great curse is my firm belief.  Indeed it's a great opportunity.  However, when coupled with greed and ambition, it can lead one to a disastrous life. In contrast to the protagonist family, there is the couple in the rich man's house itself.  There is the woman working as a housekeeper and the husband living incognito in the basement.  They too were poor like the other family but did not seek the thrill of becoming rich.  They were content with what they had, even if it meant one of them living in the basement.  Contentment is indeed a very noble virtue.  

Our relationship with nature

A good short video summing up my lesson for my students about our relationship with the earth! 

True character

Most often the ones who get noticed and are in the limelight are the 'performers' not the real 'workers'.  Rarely do the ones who work silently and consistently get the recognition and appreciation they deserve.  Today was one such rare occasion. 

Someone who is not renown for his oratory skills or expertise in big matters, but someone who is concerned and caring.  He does not seek for any show or high praises.  He is rather shy and is often looked down by others for his sober character and personality.  But when someone really needs help and a concerned presence beside them, he is the one ready and willing. No one needs to ask him, he senses it and makes himself available - again, silently! 

Happy b'day dear confrere!

Peter and Paul

Peter and Paul, the two great stalwarts of the early Church were not the best of men around those times.  They certainly were not the most capable and celebrated individuals in Israel of those days.  Evaluating others among the apostles, there was John who was of an impeccable character.  Someone who was also loved greatly by the Lord himself.  Or there was Mathew or Luke the educated ones.  But it was Peter, the illiterate, the fisherman, the mild, who was appointed as head of the apostles and ultimately given the keys of the Kingdom. 

Paul was no saint. He was a scholar, yes, but if his history were to be examined, he would have been the last one to be approached for standing for Christ.  Yet, he is the one who goes out to the non-Jews.  Together with Peter, he plants the seed of Christian faith in the heart of Roman empire.

None of them were given the mission because of their worthiness or talents.   They were entrusted with the mission and grace followed.  A good reminder for each one of us that it is God who has blessed us with all our talents and gifts, we only exercise them to the best of our capabilities.  

Secondly, there was no single hero doing all the work.  Something we see in Bollywood movies - all down to one man to do all the good!  The Church was a living example of work-in-communion.  Everyone, including God, did one's bit. Nothing greater or better.  Just what one could with the given-grace.  

Joseph Cafasso, discernment and compassion

Some interesting facts learnt this morning... 

As we commemorate the feast of St Joseph Cafasso, a trusted confessor of Don Bosco during his early years of theological studies and priesthood, I learnt that 

• Fr Cafasso was merely four years older to Don Bosco
• That Fr Cafasso passed away in his late forties. 

I always thought of him as someone much older than Don Bosco.  Of course, Don Bosco himself was no teenager around his ordination, but still for someone that young to be able to guide Don Bosco in his early stages of vocation and apostolate, especially with such great influence and finesse, is truly remarkable.  

That grace of discernment, helping oneself and others discern one's life-choices is something that has always fascinated me.  I greatly admire those people who have a great sense of calmness about how they do it, the depths which they see and the paths they help others walk on.  

Fr Cafasso came from a rather poor family.  His delicate health did not make things any better for him.  However, he was able to convert that personal pain into compassion for others.  Those struggles and challenging experiences of his life, he was able to transform into meaningful lessons for himself and also for others too. That's something! That's truly some grace and effort.  

Wrapped in love

I received this photo from Mum today.  I thought it was the gifts that she received from those at home on the occasion of her b'day.  I recognized the drawing as a gift from my niece because I had deceived her into adding my name to her card.  What I did not expect was that she leaves out her own name from it!  But I'll have to speak to her to know what exactly she meant or had in mind when she put only my name on the card.   

However, looking at the bag in the photo I presumed it would have been a saree or a piece of clothing (as the bag was of a textile shop) gifted by Willy and Roshni.  But I was wrong!  Mum sent a voice message after the photo: "The drawing/card was handed to me in this bag.  The bag was the envelope!"

Theology of the Eucharist

Ethiopia suffered a terrible famine during the years 1984 to 1986.  Cardinal Hume of Westminister tells about an incident that happened when he visited Ethiopia in the middle of the famine.  One of the places he visited was a settlement up in the hills where the people were waiting for food which was unlikely to arrive.  He was taken there in a helicopter.  

As he got out of the helicopter a small boy, aged about ten, came up to him and took his hand.  He was wearing nothing but a loincloth round his waist.  The while time the cardinal was there the little child would not let go of his hand.  

As they went around he made two gestures: with one hand he pointed to his mouth, and with the other he took the cardinal's nand and rubbed it on his cheek.  

Later the cardinal said, "Here was an orphan boy who was lost and starving.  Yet by two simple gestures he indicated our two fundamental needs or hungers.  With one gesture he showed me his hunger for food, and with the other his hunger for love." 

"I have never forgotten that incident, and to this day I wonder whether that child is still alive. I remember that as I boarded the helicopter he stood and looked at me reproachfully."

[Source: Found as part of the 'homily' on a piece of photocopied paper! Not sure of the original source! Certainly not mine!]

Happy b'day Mummy

Today is Mummy's b'day.  And of course, I had to cleverly convince my niece to add my name to her b'day greeting card which she was preparing.  

Mummy tells me that she was strictly warned not to see the drawing till she is presented with it.  So much so, she was told not to enter the room where my nephew and niece were preparing the card.  And if she did have to enter, she'd have to knock, announce her entrance and only when permitted enter the room. And of all the rooms in the house, which room were they using?  Mummy's!!  So in preparation for her b'day, she was not to enter her own room - at least not without permission!  

No wonder, Mum calls her room, the general ward!

One loaf, one bread

The celebration of the feast of Corpus Christi, the Body and Blood of Christ, is a good occasion to remind ourselves of our wholeness with God.  The Christian idea of faith and fellowship is never solitary.  It seeks and IS communion. 

The description of St Paul of the Eucharist more as a loaf than a single piece of bread is a beautiful analogy.  However, very much forgotten or left out in our exposition of the Eucharist.  The body of Christ is one loaf, one bread.  We are part of that body in as much as each slice of that loaf is still the bread.  But an individual slice is not considered the 'whole' bread.  Neither can we consume the whole loaf all at once.  So even though the bread is consumed or used one slice at a time, it has its relevance and place in the whole loaf.  Apart from the slices, there is no bread.

Sanctuary

As priests and religious our vision can sometimes be so narrow that we fail miserably in living a normal life - and rightly so!  In times when all around the world there are protests against racism and calls for greater equality in day-to-day life among all, especially giving those coloured due recognition, we religious are more concerned about opening and cleaning the Churches with the easing of the lockdown.  Protestors, in spite of the threat of the Corona virus, assemble to voice their demands for equality and humanity to be recognised.  Rather than join them, we are most concerned with how much hand sanitizer gel to procure and how to clean the church door handles!  

I do not agree with all the forms the protest under the slogan 'Black lives matter' takes on or all the consequences of them.  I do not even approve of that slogan itself - I believe it should rather be 'All lives matter!'  However, one thing I keep asking myself is, if the clergy are not keen and happy to go out to meet the people in their lives, in their homes, in their struggles, in their situations, how on earth can we expect them to come to Church?  Why should they?  We are actually expecting the laity to have a great amount of faith to be able to fight their day-to-day survival and humane battles ALONE and also have a deep faith - again, all by themselves.  How can we religious claim to be 'representatives' of God and not be with them in their everyday struggle?  And then have the audacity to question and reprimand the very same people for not coming to Church even on a Sunday?  

If the clergy cannot be 'outside' the church with the people, we do not have the right to expect the laity 'inside' the church! If the boundary for me as a religious, is the outer wall of the church which I do not (want to?) go beyond, then that very wall can be the boundary, the laity need not cross to get into the church!  The sanctuary in the church is not a sanctuary (refuge) for the religious! 

Listening and following

In the readings of the week we see Elijah beginning very solemnly and with great confidence.  Then he loses all of that confidence and trusts and takes flight.  He literally hides himself in a cave out of fear of being murdered!  And when God meets him in the gentle breeze, he tells him to go back to where he came from. To face his torturers rather than flee.  To walk right into the face of death, rather than in the opposite direction.  And Elijah does what he is told.  

Elijah in more than one sense is a very failed prophet.  A very flippety-floppety prophet.  Someone just like us.  Like me.  Courageous and daring at one moment.  Timid and anxious the next.  Emboldened and  very outgoing on one day.  The very next day wake up confused and tired!  But in this very unsteady life pattern, there is one thing Elijah teaches us - me - very clearly:  listening to God!  He is gifted with the grace of discernment and when he hears God speak, he follows!  No more crippling fear. No withholding doubts. No petty vision of mere survival. 

Everyday faith

Today's first reading is nothing short of a marvel comic hero episode.  Elijah foretells of rain and when King Ahab has taken off on his chariot, he tucks in his robe and out runs him!  That's some super hero stuff!  

And tomorrow's reading is quite contrary to this super hero thing.  We see God revealing himself in a gentle breeze, rather than a torrent or fire or an earthquake.  Nothing dramatic or solemn.  Just plain and simple.  Everydayness!  

Our faith is more akin to the latter day experience rather than the former.  Although we tend to look for and wish it were more dramatic and action-filled than mundane and routine!  But what is mundane and routine is what builds up character in the long run, not the sporadic and tempestuous. 

Choosing the better

In the first reading of the day we read how Elijah has to ask God to rain down fire on the holocaust in order to prove himself as the God of Israel.  What is interesting to note is the attitude of the people.  They are literally like total babies unable to decide for themselves whether they are on Yahweh's side or wish to believe and follow Baal (other gods).  

This indecisiveness is an easy and safe option.  With no commitments to any side, one is free to pick and choose whatever one wants as per one's convenience.  It is what most of us would naturally do.  But the Lord asks of us a total commitment. Unfortunately it is understood as a 'one or the other' option.  Choosing the Lord does not mean giving up the world.  It means continued living in the world with a different perspective.  Radicality is not in exclusivity but in striking a healthy balance with the focus clearly on God, and the other, prior to oneself.  The Lord never asks us to give up something good, unless it is for the better!  

The generous widow

Elijah is told to meet the widow in Zarephath and he goes.  He finds the widow picking twigs to prepare the last morsel of food she has for her son and herself.  And Elijah tells her to first prepare something for him.  Sincerely doubt if it was Elijah's own desire for food to ask of her bread, that too from someone who is so poor!  

No sensible woman in the right state of mind would do that: offer the last morsel of food that she is left with for her child and herself to a total stranger.  Yet she does this.  She shares the last morsel of food with this complete stranger merely because he asks her.  

The story can be about Elijah who moves to that place merely on the Lord's command.  At the same time it is very much of that widow who is generous enough to share the least she has with someone in need.  There are so many such men and women who selflessly share their gifts, resources and even their own lives for the sake of others... hope the Lord never empties their bowl and jug too!  

Istvan Sandor

In the Salesian family we remember today the courage and the great apostolic zeal of Bl. Stephen Sandor, known more locally in Hungary as Istvan. 

Living and working during the communist regime has never been an easy task for religious.  What catches my attention of Istvan is his zeal for working as per his Salesian charism even in those dangerous circumstances.  With all the liberty and time at hand, I find it difficult to know and decide what to do.  But here is a young man, filled with the spirit of Don Bosco who finds and embarks on youth work, knowing well that he is risking his life in this endeavour.  That kind sensibility to notice the need and respond with all one's resources, even to the extent of risking one's own life, is something I can hardly even dream of!  

I mostly pray for that grace to be able to notice the need of young people and respond appropriately.  If Istvan could do so much in such restricted times and circumstances, the possibilities I have are numerous.  I only need to see and get going!

Medieval weddings

Only yesterday did I learn that in medieval times the weddings were conducted not inside the church but at the Church doorstep!  Among the other reasons I'm yet to discover, the main reason I'm told that this was the case was because marriage in those times was still a social contract.  The notion of it being a sacrament was not yet formulated or thought about. (Only baptism and holy Eucharist were considered as sacraments).  So it was basically the couple making the vow to one another, in public, with the priest merely as a witness.  

Another reason was that there be not any malpractice.  So the weddings were held in broad daylight, out in the open.  Even later when weddings were conducted inside the Church, they were meant to be done with doors open.  Not behind closed doors!  Even today, here in England, weddings are not conducted at night!!  Just so that there is no 'substitute' bride or bridegroom!  

Though the wordings, rituals and the position of the bride and groom (according to the altar) remain the same from the medieval times, the deeper sacramental theology of it has developed much.  Also interesting to know that then - as in some parts of the world, even today - marriage was basically a formal consent.  What mattered most and important was that the couple live a married life - even if without the formal rite!  Am told that for long in Scotland, if a couple lived a good married life, they were as good as married, even if they did not have a formal ceremony or public rite.  The fact that they were living together as good people was sufficient for them to claim any benefits of a married couple (for example succession or name rights for children, widows...).  It was only when the European Union asked for its formal wording in the constitution or public policy did people realise that there wasn't any!  It was by common consent practiced and never formally written!  

Grafting the gospel

One gets to hear and read of the phrase 'planting the Gospel' sometimes in Christian literature or discussions.  This phrase refers to the process of evangelisation/mission, especially among those who have not heard of Jesus or the Gospels before.  But according to me a better and more apt phrase would be 'grafting the Gospel'.  

Though the idea is the same, there are subtle differences in how one perceives the Gospel and how one sees it 'taking root'.  No culture ever absorbs the Gospel in its entirity at the first instance.  No matter how great an opportunity they get to witness the Christian example, a culture always absorbs a 'new' input only in layers and over a period of time.  Therefore to expect the first 'wave' of those who come in contact with the Gospel to become 'Christian' would be to see them as totally uprooting themselves from who and what they were before - culturally speaking.  It is only after a certain period of time - and ages - that we arrive at a balance of making the most of the Gospel and the culture we call our own.  Exactly as an agriculturalist would view a grafted plant as not a perfect product, but a merger of two different plants; however, the fruit of that grafted plant will eventually have a better inherent structure of both - no more as two different plants, but as one plant.  

To expect the Gospel to replace absolutely and permanently one's culture is unchristian.  

Religious poverty

The notion of living and working for the poor, as a religious who takes the vow of poverty, is always a very conveniently moulded construct.  We interpret poverty to mean detachment.  And then possess everything that a middle-class family or even the rich have!  

I still vividly remember having this discussion with Benji during my novitiate asking him what right or privilege do I have to stay in this newly built novitiate while the ones who built it are still living in huts, right in front of the house.  He then told me, "To work you need strength and energy.  That's why you have food that will nourish you and a bed that lets you have sufficient rest." I wasn't really convinced then, neither am I still!  

To work with and for the poor, one really has to be poor.  The concept that in order to help someone rise out of poverty we have to be above poverty ourselves, stems from a misplaced concept of helping those poor to get into the middle class and above.  Our primary job is not to help the poor transition to the upper levels of economic status.  Our job is to show and be God's love for them!  To show by word and deed that God loves, that he loves especially the poor.  This means to stand by them.  With them!  Not above or apart from them.  

Jesus was Italian!

A couple whom the parish priest had never seen in Church before, approached him asking him to baptise their child.  The Parish priest in all politeness asked which Church do they normally go to.  When told that they've never been to Church, he asked them for the reason they wish to baptise their child.  They explained, "We're Italians and we have a strong Christian tradition.  We want our child too to grow up in that tradition.  Moreover Jesus also was Italian!" 

Well, logically speaking Israel was under Roman authority then and so it could be said that Jesus was Italian... But not sure if the Parish priest was convinced of the reason for the child to be baptised! 

New wine in old skins

While having our special barbeque yesterday afternoon to celebrate the perpetual profession of Br Peter Gbertyo, we were pulling the leg of Fr Sean who is 87.  And somehow the topic came to his love for wine and it all narrowed down to 'new wine in old skin'!  For once the Biblical proverb was proved wrong... there certainly is no wine spilling out of this old skin! 

Love at the heart of forgiveness

At the heart of the sacrament of reconciliation is not forgiveness, but love.  The graces of forgiveness, mercy and transformation are essential and integral to the sacrament of reconciliation but if love does not form the central aspect of it, then the whole procedure turns out to be no better than a vending machine!  You put your sins in and out comes forgiveness!  What actually makes the whole process alive and relevant is love.  Love that God has for us.  Love that we have for God!  Our repentance is primarily because we have consciously offended someone we love.  God forgives is always available because he loves us.  

African violet

The latest addition to my indoor 'garden'... an African violet, a gift from Mena. 

God at work

In one of his letters to the Thessalonians, St Paul appeals to them saying that all that he and his companions did was to preach the Good News, purely out of love for God.  They had no hidden personal agenda.  Neither did they seek anything for themselves. To this end, he continues, they offered them 'not only the Good News but our whole lives as well'.

Can a genuine proclamation of the Good News be bifurcated from one's actual living?  It is as if to say, preaching is one thing and our actual life and living, is another.  Personally there cannot be a discrepancy or a divide.  Sincerely proclaiming the Gospel is life - not apart from it. 

However, there could be the case where one very effectively preaches the gospel but is not really moved by it.  The hearers or those who witness this proclamation are moved to change and transformation - but not the one offering the gospel.  This too is possible.  After all, it is not the one speaking or the one listening that solely decides the outcome.  God too is part of the process.  So God, the gospel values and the one undergoing change are at work.  And the preacher?  Yes, the one preaching too is involved, but not as a witness, but as an actor - a good one at that! 

The good Zaccheus

The episode of Jesus meeting Zaccheus is always an interesting read.  Somehow it has a certain simplicity and earthiness about it. Perhaps it has to do with Zaccheus climbing the tree - a joyful, children's play.  

However, contrary to popular belief that since Zaccheus was a tax collector and hence certainly a corrupt official, I think that he was basically a good and honest person, all along. First of all, to believe that all - everyone? - tax collectors were cheats, would be too much of an exaggeration.  Not fair! There certainly would have been some kind-hearted ones - at least a handful in a whole nation! Secondly, for one to immediately have a change of heart, that too so radically is not really possible.  That the confession and repentance was genuine, we know from Jesus' interaction with him.  Jesus would have called his lie, if Zaccheus wasn't speaking from his heart.  So Zaccheus would basically have been a good man, with perhaps some illegal dealings once in a way;  and that dishonesty would have been stirring his conscience over time.  The encounter with Jesus actually is the tipping point.  

And practically speaking, if he were that corrupt, repaying back all those whom he cheated, four times over that too after giving away half his property to the poor, would have made him an utter destitute! He would have had to borrow in order to repay them all!! 

RIP: Sarah, and her family

Incidents happen all the time, all over the world.  Some of which we experience first hand, in our own lives.  Some major events we hear through the media.  Most of them we do not hear at all.  Only those we witness, especially those involving close relations, linger on in our emotional quotient.  The rest, especially those we hear in the news, are no more relevant than the numbers we see on our watch!  However, if and when, we know of someone involved in those 'statistical accidents' that particular incident begins to re-configure in our thoughts. 

One such personal experience was mine when I heard that Sarah Polani, a research scholar from our university department (a year junior to me), was on the plane that crashed in Pakistan last week. She, and her family (husband and three boys), died in that plane crash. The 97 who died in that crash, is not a mere number anymore! 

During the few interactions I had with Sarah, both in our group and as an individual, she came across to me as a fiercely independent and strong willed person. That she was a teacher before coming to commence her PhD at Royal Holloway, need not have been said - it was clear, at least to me.  She certainly was very determined and focused about her work and her choices.  Ever eager to learn and make the most of the opportunities that came her way, in doing her PhD.  Coming from a neighbouring Asian country, I could understand her passion to verbally prove her point - even if it meant interrupting someone while they were offering a feedback.  That's something we (Asians) constantly do; not out of disrespect but more so out of habit. 

God grant her and her family, eternal rest!  

Jesus without profession

Reading a particular reflection on religious consecration, in the light of our religious profession on May 24, I came across the following passage:

Through consecration we follow Christ who was poor, obedient and chaste.  Jesus lived without possessions...  Jesus lived a chaste and celibate life...  Jesus obeyed his Father.  

Mistakenly I read the second sentence as 'Jesus lived without profession'.  As I continued reading, it occurred to me that I missed something.  So I read that para again.  It was only then that I realised I had misread.  However, that mistaken reading also made perfect sense.  Jesus never made a vow or solemn public to live poor, chaste and obedient.  Yet he was! 

This is the aspect we religious need to remember.  Our consecration is not merely because we said those words.  It is basically because we believe in living that kind of life.  We live our religious profession not as a consequence of a set of formulas or oaths, but as an outpouring of love.  The consecration is only a reminder - to ourselves.  Not a guarantee.  The fruitfulness of our consecration is not in repetition of those words of our profession daily or annually, but in our living out of a life full of love for God and all living beings. 

Jesus working from home

Quite insightful and very contextual... a brief, but to the point description of the feast of the Ascension for our times... very amusing!

Happy anniversary

Today is Papa and Mummy's wedding anniversary.  However, it is also a bit weird today.  This being the first time in 44 years that Papa is not around with us, especially Mummy on this day.  We never had any big or grand celebrations, except maybe for their silver jubilee.  It has always been a very quiet and low key celebration - just like all our birthdays.  However, we always made it a point to call, talk, sing for the occasion specially.  In earlier days I would send them a letter in advance. 

Nonetheless, I did wish Mummy yesterday.  Mummy wasn't too sure what to say.  She then said, only half the part is here.  The other half is not there to celebrate.  I told her, "He will get his share of greetings too! For now, you take our greetings for both!"  Later I told Willy, that Papa for sure, would have already made some deals with St Lawrence in heaven: "Full bottle for the day!"... just like he did every year with Willy on such days of celebration! 

Happy anniversary, Papa and Mummy!  Thank you for all that you have been for us! 

Silence and Listening

The two words silent and listen have the exact same number of alphabet and the same alphabet too.  Just a different order.

Both are so related that one is not possible without the other.  In order to listen, we need to be silent.  And silence comes as a discipline of listening.  One does not exist without the other.  Either both are present together or both are absent.

And the best part is although it is a discipline, it is in letting go that one truly masters this art.  You win by letting go.  The more one forces oneself to achieve it, the more distant they seem.  Weird, but true.

MHoC novena (day 9)

The final day of the novena to MHoC... Mary as mother and teacher

The first miracle

Hearing the gospel event of the first miracle of Jesus at Cana, this afternoon, it struck me that Mary did not know what Jesus would do.  Or perhaps she did?  We don't know. But the fact is that she knew he'd do something. 

Secondly, this first miracle of Jesus is no great life-saver.  At the most it is matter of saving the family hosting the wedding from some embarrassment. And that too what does he do?  Produce wine!  Not some food for the starving or cure for the terminally ill.  Wine for recreation! 

More than anything I think this event is one of trust and obedience. Trust that Mary had in Jesus, that he'd do 'something' to address the evident embarrassment of the host.  Obedience of Jesus to Mary, just a word and he does it.