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22 January 2019

Accompaniment

As part of the (personal rare!) reflection on the General Chapter and its preparation, I felt that that youngsters here in the West have a greater need for accompaniment and support than those in the East.  Youngsters here tend to 'gain' their independence soon after their school - more or less at the age of 18.  By then they finish school and mostly move out of their parents house, either for higher education or work.  From then on their dependence on the parents drastically reduces.  The physical distance from home makes a lot of difference.  Even if the children were 'independent' for their personal matters since a couple of years (their sixth form or so), the real moving out of the house, marks a clear separation. 

Unlike this scenario, in the East, children stay with their parents right till they get married. And most even when married continue to live in the same house with the parents (at least the boys).  So in this sense they still enjoy that support of the parents and elders at home.  While in the West, young people learn taking on responsibility early on in life, the danger of them not having anyone to fall back on when in times of crisis, especially if they are far away from home or do not really enjoy a comfortable relationship with their parents, is greater.  It is at these crucial times when they need a shoulder to lean on or a listening ear, or a gentle pat or knock (depending), that most youngsters either make or break themselves.  Most rely on friends. But not always.  Social media is perhaps the closest 'friend' most have! 

In this scenario, accompaniment matters most.  It is not mere presence in those crucial or demanding times, but much prior to that!  Only when a young person feels comfortable with someone or looks upto someone as more than a friend, but not necessarily as a parent, that he or she is going to turn back to that person in times of need.  In this sense, accompaniment envelopes presence and demands a prolonged and sustained effort. 

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