Indian mums

 (From The Times UK edition, Monday 18 January 2021 p. 24... by Sathnam Sanghera) 

INDIAN MUMS COULD DO ALL THE VACCINES BY NEXT WEEK 

It has become something of a sport to come up with ideas for who would be more efficient than our flailing government at getting vaccines into arms. 

My colleague Matt Chorley has suggested Pizza Express staff on the grounds that "they know how to deliver the same thing again and again and again. No variation. No mistakes." Other have variously suggested notoriously determined Amazon drivers, famously resourceful theatre stage managers, habitually speedy Aldi checkout staff and the apparently terrifying individuals who run ballet exams.  

My vote, however, goes for Indian mothers. If we tackled vaccinations with the singlemindedness with which my mum raised four children, looked after my sick father and worked at the same time, the task would be done by next week. Moreover, any leftover vaccine would be swiftly packed into Tupperware and distributed around the planet.  Covid deniers would be dismissed with a tight slap, and no one would be allowed to leave without partaking of a nice snack.  

Indeed, it strikes me that Indian mums would also be pretty great at managing other aspects of the war against Covid. After all, they are experts in contact tracing (given their supernatural ability to tell if you're dating someone unsuitable), in the prevention of panic buying (if you bulk buy every time you shop, you never fret about running out) and lockdowns (with a famous history of preventing their offspring from doing anything that might risk disgrace). Sign them up!